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Downloaded from
YTS.BZ
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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.BZ
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Mr. St. Germain,
4
00:01:21,415 --> 00:01:24,953
you've served 30 years of
a life sentence.
5
00:01:25,118 --> 00:01:27,055
Do you think
you've been rehabilitated?
6
00:01:27,220 --> 00:01:31,158
And are you ready to be
a productive member of society?
7
00:01:53,014 --> 00:01:54,214
This too.
8
00:06:36,364 --> 00:06:39,300
Retired US Marine
veteran Brian Patton,
9
00:06:39,466 --> 00:06:41,936
who spent 19 years
at the factory.
10
00:06:42,103 --> 00:06:44,572
Well, now,
reality is kicking in
11
00:06:44,739 --> 00:06:46,874
in the factory's final days.
12
00:06:47,041 --> 00:06:49,977
Brian, bring us back
to when you first heard
about the closure.
13
00:06:50,144 --> 00:06:53,514
From you guys,
that's how we found out.
14
00:06:53,681 --> 00:06:55,216
Now you're painting a picture
15
00:06:55,383 --> 00:06:57,952
of what the future
is like without us?
16
00:06:58,119 --> 00:07:00,054
We've been loyal to America,
17
00:07:00,221 --> 00:07:02,990
and we want
that loyalty reciprocated.
18
00:07:03,157 --> 00:07:04,792
The man took away the factory,
19
00:07:04,959 --> 00:07:06,627
but he didn't take
the people with...
20
00:08:08,656 --> 00:08:10,291
Frightened?
21
00:08:10,458 --> 00:08:12,159
What are you-- what are you
talking about, frightened?
22
00:08:14,662 --> 00:08:16,496
- He actually said that?
- -How do you expect to get hired?
23
00:08:16,664 --> 00:08:18,632
I don't know,
you're the headhunter,
you tell me, I'm just...
24
00:08:27,875 --> 00:08:29,744
- Hey, Tommy. Tommy.
- I'm back.
25
00:08:29,910 --> 00:08:31,846
-What's going on, brother?
-Yeah, what's good, brother?
26
00:08:32,013 --> 00:08:33,848
I haven't heard from you
in years.
27
00:08:34,015 --> 00:08:36,250
You know, just, uh...
28
00:08:38,085 --> 00:08:39,787
just-- just
in between gigs, yeah.
29
00:08:39,954 --> 00:08:42,623
Cool,.
30
00:08:42,790 --> 00:08:44,458
Demo, sure.
31
00:08:44,625 --> 00:08:47,228
Just-- let's go--
let's go fuck up some shit
32
00:08:47,395 --> 00:08:48,729
like the old days, man.
33
00:08:48,929 --> 00:08:51,665
- Cool..
- Mm-hmm.
34
00:08:51,866 --> 00:08:54,503
Yeah, yeah,
just-- just text me the info.
35
00:08:54,668 --> 00:08:56,937
Yeah, I'll-- I'll grab
some thermals on the way.
36
00:08:57,071 --> 00:08:58,706
Okay, yeah,
I'll talk to you later.
37
00:08:58,873 --> 00:08:59,974
Bye, man.
38
00:09:21,562 --> 00:09:23,664
Oh, my God, Mom. Look.
39
00:09:24,965 --> 00:09:26,667
It's Alice's ex.
40
00:09:26,834 --> 00:09:29,003
Troy used
to play hockey with him.
41
00:09:29,136 --> 00:09:31,305
Must be a real.
42
00:09:31,472 --> 00:09:32,640
He's homeless now.
43
00:09:34,509 --> 00:09:36,377
Troy always said
he was a nice kid.
44
00:09:36,545 --> 00:09:38,446
But the war
fucked him up wicked bad.
45
00:09:40,014 --> 00:09:41,615
Can't imagine
living with all that guilt.
46
00:11:44,573 --> 00:11:47,041
- Hey, man.
- Hmm?
47
00:11:47,174 --> 00:11:48,242
Do I know you?
48
00:11:49,910 --> 00:11:51,680
No, I don't think so.
49
00:11:52,780 --> 00:11:54,848
-Yeah, you don't know me?
-No.
50
00:11:55,015 --> 00:11:56,585
You just fucking smiling
at me like that?
51
00:11:56,750 --> 00:12:00,354
- No, man, I, uh--
- You fucking know me.
52
00:12:00,487 --> 00:12:04,091
-You know me, look at you,
your fucking smile on your face.
-Troy.
53
00:12:04,258 --> 00:12:05,759
Is everything okay?
54
00:12:05,926 --> 00:12:07,461
Yeah, Troy here's just playing
fucking peek-a-boo
55
00:12:07,629 --> 00:12:08,963
- from the fucking panty aisle.
- What?
56
00:12:09,129 --> 00:12:10,030
I think there's been
a misunderstanding.
57
00:12:10,197 --> 00:12:11,633
No, there's no misunderstanding.
58
00:12:11,799 --> 00:12:13,367
Hey, Mom, Mom, you don't
have to be afraid here.
59
00:12:13,535 --> 00:12:15,269
-Hey, Dude--
-Don't put
your fucking hands on me.
60
00:12:15,436 --> 00:12:17,371
-Take it easy.
-Don't put
your fucking hands on me.
61
00:12:17,505 --> 00:12:19,173
-Take it easy.
-Why don't you go ahead
and blow your whistle?
62
00:12:19,340 --> 00:12:20,908
Come on, Troy, blow your fucking
whistle for your wife, Troy.
63
00:12:21,075 --> 00:12:22,243
What's your fucking--
64
00:12:22,409 --> 00:12:25,246
Troy, knock it off!
65
00:12:25,412 --> 00:12:27,181
Hey, get off him!
66
00:12:56,511 --> 00:12:58,412
Wakey, wakey,
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00:12:58,580 --> 00:12:59,980
eggs and bakey.
68
00:13:00,114 --> 00:13:01,215
Coach O?
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00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:04,218
Once a Shamrock,
always a winner.
70
00:13:07,656 --> 00:13:09,456
Why are you dressed
like a fucking cop?
71
00:13:15,095 --> 00:13:16,698
Sergeant O'Riordan.
72
00:13:18,499 --> 00:13:19,634
Montague PD.
73
00:13:20,669 --> 00:13:22,436
Jesus Christ,
you look like a beast, man.
74
00:13:22,604 --> 00:13:24,104
Wait, are you still competing?
75
00:13:24,673 --> 00:13:26,373
Only if it's
a pie-eating contest.
76
00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:42,289
Do you even know
where the fuck you are?
77
00:13:44,659 --> 00:13:46,761
The VA Medical Center.
78
00:13:46,927 --> 00:13:48,596
Oh, shit.
79
00:13:48,763 --> 00:13:51,298
It's the only way that they
could get me back in this place.
80
00:13:53,668 --> 00:13:56,036
Am I under arrest?
81
00:13:57,539 --> 00:13:59,507
This seems
a bit fucking dramatic.
82
00:14:01,543 --> 00:14:03,712
What, were you afraid
I was gonna run away?
83
00:14:08,516 --> 00:14:11,385
We can start with the fact
that you're lucky to be alive.
84
00:14:12,821 --> 00:14:14,321
There was a lot of shit
in your system this morning
85
00:14:14,488 --> 00:14:16,957
when I collared you
for assaulting an innocent man
86
00:14:17,124 --> 00:14:19,093
in front of his wife
and baby girl.
87
00:14:21,763 --> 00:14:23,197
Do you remember any of that?
88
00:14:25,466 --> 00:14:27,034
There was this guy.
He looked familiar.
89
00:14:27,201 --> 00:14:29,470
He was following me
around the store.
90
00:14:30,538 --> 00:14:31,673
He was, uh...
91
00:14:33,374 --> 00:14:35,510
He was blowing this--
he was blowing a whistle.
92
00:14:35,677 --> 00:14:38,245
He looked familiar
because his name is Troy Baker.
93
00:14:39,213 --> 00:14:42,416
He played defense with you
on our hockey team.
94
00:14:43,585 --> 00:14:44,952
And that wasn't a whistle.
95
00:14:46,420 --> 00:14:47,555
It was a vape pen.
96
00:14:49,089 --> 00:14:50,625
I think
you got your wires crossed.
97
00:14:57,665 --> 00:14:59,299
I'll be outside
when you're done.
98
00:15:06,541 --> 00:15:08,810
It's too early to know
if the multiple
99
00:15:08,976 --> 00:15:11,613
traumatic brain injuries
you sustained during deployment
100
00:15:11,746 --> 00:15:13,681
exacerbated the incident.
101
00:15:13,848 --> 00:15:16,083
And your epilepsy test
came back negative.
102
00:15:18,553 --> 00:15:19,821
Epilepsy?
103
00:15:21,823 --> 00:15:23,023
I had a seizure?
104
00:15:23,957 --> 00:15:26,293
Environmental factors
can induce seizures
105
00:15:26,460 --> 00:15:28,730
in patients
with similar brain injuries.
106
00:15:28,897 --> 00:15:32,332
Stress, lack of sleep,
drug and alcohol abuse.
107
00:15:32,499 --> 00:15:35,169
Well, how about
getting fucking tased?
108
00:15:35,335 --> 00:15:37,572
Can you recall
any prior episodes?
109
00:15:53,153 --> 00:15:55,657
-What's this?
-Get yourself into
a program, okay?
110
00:15:55,824 --> 00:15:58,125
Pre-trial.
Help reduce the sentence.
111
00:15:58,258 --> 00:16:00,829
I'm having fucking seizures,
and you're giving me a pamphlet?
112
00:16:00,994 --> 00:16:03,130
That's not how the judge
is gonna see this.
113
00:16:03,297 --> 00:16:05,499
Not with your priors.
114
00:16:05,667 --> 00:16:07,334
-Not with all the drugs and
booze that was in your system.
-Okay, so what?
115
00:16:07,502 --> 00:16:10,705
I gotta-- I gotta join
a circle jerk of whining fobbits
116
00:16:10,872 --> 00:16:14,074
who've duped their doctors
into thinking
that they're basket cases
117
00:16:14,241 --> 00:16:16,511
just so they could get
100% benefits?
118
00:16:16,678 --> 00:16:18,847
Do you know what
the fucking VAs put me through?
119
00:16:19,012 --> 00:16:21,215
-It's gonna be a one-on-one.
-No, no, no.
120
00:16:21,381 --> 00:16:23,016
-I'm not doing that.
-Well, you're gonna do it.
121
00:16:23,183 --> 00:16:24,619
No, I'll do the fucking time
before I do that.
122
00:16:24,786 --> 00:16:26,654
Okay, tough guy.
You're gonna do this, all right?
123
00:16:26,821 --> 00:16:28,121
If you have a brain
in your fucking head,
124
00:16:28,288 --> 00:16:29,891
you're gonna
listen to me right now.
125
00:16:30,057 --> 00:16:32,794
-I'll think about it.
-Yeah, you better think hard.
126
00:16:32,961 --> 00:16:35,930
Because the next time you try
to provoke a lethal response
from law enforcement,
127
00:16:36,096 --> 00:16:37,799
you might not have an angel
sitting on your shoulder.
128
00:16:37,966 --> 00:16:40,267
Well, lucky for me
I got a fucking angel then.
129
00:16:41,201 --> 00:16:42,504
What are you doing?
130
00:16:42,637 --> 00:16:44,071
What the fuck are you doing?
131
00:16:45,339 --> 00:16:46,908
Did you ever know me
132
00:16:47,074 --> 00:16:49,711
to treat one of your classmates
different than the next?
133
00:16:52,112 --> 00:16:53,280
No, sir.
134
00:16:54,281 --> 00:16:55,683
This isn't my some of the time.
135
00:16:55,850 --> 00:16:57,484
This is my all of the time.
136
00:16:58,920 --> 00:17:00,087
And this?
137
00:17:00,254 --> 00:17:01,455
This is on my time.
138
00:17:02,557 --> 00:17:03,992
If you're struggling,
139
00:17:04,157 --> 00:17:06,326
and I can help,
I'm there, no question.
140
00:17:10,865 --> 00:17:12,432
That's real fucking tender.
141
00:17:12,600 --> 00:17:15,102
That's nice. That was good.
I felt it right here.
142
00:17:15,269 --> 00:17:16,638
I felt it right in my heart.
143
00:17:16,804 --> 00:17:19,607
-Right-- Hmm.
-Get the fuck out of my car.
144
00:17:19,741 --> 00:17:21,408
-Are you serious?
-Go, now.
145
00:17:21,576 --> 00:17:23,076
-No.
-Get the fuck out!
146
00:17:23,243 --> 00:17:24,512
-Are you fucking serious?
-Out!
147
00:17:24,679 --> 00:17:25,880
Are you fucking kidding me?
148
00:17:26,014 --> 00:17:27,615
I'm just-- I'm joking.
149
00:17:32,452 --> 00:17:35,489
The arraignment's
tomorrow, asshole.
150
00:17:35,623 --> 00:17:37,792
-Thanks for the flyer.
-Grow the fuck up!
151
00:17:42,362 --> 00:17:43,497
Shit.
152
00:17:52,339 --> 00:17:53,641
Hey!
153
00:17:53,808 --> 00:17:55,510
Buddy, let's go.
154
00:17:55,677 --> 00:17:56,744
Off my property.
155
00:17:57,712 --> 00:17:58,880
I'm sorry.
156
00:17:59,446 --> 00:18:01,181
My-- my apologies.
157
00:18:01,348 --> 00:18:02,617
Um--
158
00:18:03,751 --> 00:18:07,454
I'm looking
for Alice St. Germain.
159
00:18:07,589 --> 00:18:10,058
This is her...
160
00:18:10,223 --> 00:18:12,060
It's her last listed address.
161
00:18:15,763 --> 00:18:17,164
She doesn't live here anymore.
162
00:18:18,298 --> 00:18:19,701
Well, you know
where she might have moved to
163
00:18:19,867 --> 00:18:21,636
or how I might find her?
164
00:18:23,303 --> 00:18:24,906
Your guess is as good as mine.
165
00:18:29,844 --> 00:18:30,979
She's my daughter.
166
00:18:36,751 --> 00:18:37,885
Are you Calvin?
167
00:18:40,287 --> 00:18:41,388
Is that you?
168
00:18:43,290 --> 00:18:45,292
Gunnery Sergeant
Whitney St. Germain.
169
00:18:45,893 --> 00:18:47,461
Alice and Brandon's dad.
170
00:18:49,463 --> 00:18:53,300
"PS, you never did tell
Alice and I what you...
171
00:18:53,467 --> 00:18:56,571
"did to leave us
so many years ago.
172
00:18:56,738 --> 00:18:58,806
"But I will forgive you.
173
00:18:58,973 --> 00:19:01,509
"And I hope you can forgive me.
174
00:19:02,644 --> 00:19:06,246
"Maybe that's a story
you can share with Calvin.
175
00:19:06,380 --> 00:19:07,749
"First drink's on me.
176
00:19:10,551 --> 00:19:14,421
"Your son, SPC
177
00:19:14,589 --> 00:19:16,057
"Brandon St. Germain."
178
00:19:18,660 --> 00:19:20,094
That's a--
179
00:19:20,260 --> 00:19:22,597
That's a really nice letter
your son wrote.
180
00:19:26,801 --> 00:19:28,870
I've been meaning
to visit him at the cemetery.
181
00:19:29,037 --> 00:19:31,906
You know, it's--
it's not too far from here.
182
00:19:36,243 --> 00:19:39,013
Look, man,
I just got out of the hospital.
183
00:19:39,179 --> 00:19:41,015
You know, I got
this wicked bad headache.
184
00:19:41,248 --> 00:19:43,483
My head is throbbing
and I haven't showered
in a couple days.
185
00:19:43,618 --> 00:19:45,385
You know,
my arm's busted. I just...
186
00:19:47,822 --> 00:19:50,792
Can I-- can I call you? Um...
187
00:19:52,727 --> 00:19:55,362
maybe we can go for a drink.
188
00:20:01,969 --> 00:20:03,504
I understand.
189
00:20:20,955 --> 00:20:22,090
You have children?
190
00:20:25,492 --> 00:20:27,562
You should know that...
191
00:20:27,729 --> 00:20:32,033
your daughter, Alice and I,
we-- we don't speak anymore.
192
00:20:32,166 --> 00:20:33,601
You know, we've been
separated for years.
193
00:20:33,768 --> 00:20:35,536
Look, I really don't have
much more for you
194
00:20:35,703 --> 00:20:37,205
than that right now, you know?
195
00:20:41,341 --> 00:20:42,275
Okay.
196
00:21:03,931 --> 00:21:05,533
Sure, I'm gonna have that drink?
197
00:21:08,035 --> 00:21:09,137
Yeah.
198
00:21:48,576 --> 00:21:51,579
I can't believe I slept through my alarm.
I'm gonna be wicked late.
199
00:21:51,779 --> 00:21:53,548
If I'd have known,
I would have woke you up.
200
00:21:53,714 --> 00:21:56,017
You already did that
when you came home last night.
201
00:21:56,184 --> 00:21:58,318
-Twice.
-Whoops.
202
00:21:58,953 --> 00:22:00,855
Look, just-- just take my truck
203
00:22:01,022 --> 00:22:02,489
and-- and I'll walk
the girls to school.
204
00:22:02,623 --> 00:22:03,825
It's fine.
205
00:22:03,991 --> 00:22:06,794
Why does mommy
sleep on the couch?
206
00:22:06,961 --> 00:22:08,963
Because she was up late
studying, honey.
207
00:22:09,130 --> 00:22:12,133
She was sleeping on
the couch even before
your last deployment.
208
00:22:12,300 --> 00:22:14,202
Wow.
Thanks for the reminder, Squid.
209
00:22:14,367 --> 00:22:16,436
Girls, after today
210
00:22:16,604 --> 00:22:18,806
we're gonna be calling mommy
Nurse Alice.
211
00:22:19,674 --> 00:22:21,909
Honey, where's your other sock?
212
00:22:22,076 --> 00:22:23,343
You lost another one, sweetie?
213
00:22:23,511 --> 00:22:24,645
He's a snuff
214
00:22:24,812 --> 00:22:28,749
and he moves slow...
215
00:22:32,419 --> 00:22:33,654
Hey, boo.
216
00:22:34,454 --> 00:22:35,556
Where's my sugar?
217
00:22:37,792 --> 00:22:39,894
-Are you fucking kidding me?
-What?
218
00:22:40,061 --> 00:22:41,963
So we're back
to morning drinking now?
219
00:22:42,129 --> 00:22:44,098
You've got Sidney's PTA
for fuck's sake.
220
00:22:44,265 --> 00:22:45,833
I just had a nip
to get the motor clean.
221
00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:47,935
Okay, we're starting
in front of the children now.
222
00:22:48,102 --> 00:22:51,505
-I'm sick and tired
of this shit.
-Oh, my God.
223
00:22:53,641 --> 00:22:56,143
It's your big day.
I thought we were celebrating.
224
00:22:56,310 --> 00:22:58,045
-You've done enough celebrating
for this whole family.
-Okay. All right.
225
00:22:58,212 --> 00:23:00,681
- Okay, Mom.
- Good morning.
226
00:23:00,848 --> 00:23:02,216
Oh.
227
00:23:02,382 --> 00:23:03,784
Look at this sight
for sore eyes.
228
00:23:03,951 --> 00:23:05,353
What the hell happened
to bowling
229
00:23:05,485 --> 00:23:06,888
and just a pitcher of beer?
230
00:23:07,054 --> 00:23:08,890
I mean,
it's not for lack of trying.
231
00:23:09,724 --> 00:23:12,793
Hey, thanks
to whoever's toothbrush this is.
232
00:23:12,960 --> 00:23:14,427
Real classy, Darryl.
233
00:23:14,629 --> 00:23:17,164
So does your wife know
her man-baby of a husband
234
00:23:17,365 --> 00:23:19,267
moved his entire family
across the country
235
00:23:19,432 --> 00:23:21,302
just so he can get
into bar fights
236
00:23:21,468 --> 00:23:24,238
and have slumber parties
with his drinking buddy
on school nights?
237
00:23:24,372 --> 00:23:28,042
You know,
I think she's just happy
to have me out of the house.
238
00:23:28,209 --> 00:23:31,913
- Do you want to hear me blow my whistle, Uncle Darryl?
- -Yes, sure, I do.
239
00:23:32,079 --> 00:23:34,382
- Just shave
and put on a collared shirt.
240
00:23:34,548 --> 00:23:36,183
Okay, I got it.
241
00:23:36,350 --> 00:23:38,286
Why do we even have
to go to Catholic school?
242
00:23:38,451 --> 00:23:40,054
- We don't even go to church.
- -Well, whose fault is that?
243
00:23:40,221 --> 00:23:42,623
We used to--
I am not doing this right now.
244
00:23:42,790 --> 00:23:44,225
Can you be any more annoying?
245
00:23:44,392 --> 00:23:46,560
-God, I hate this stupid family.
-Hey!
246
00:23:47,595 --> 00:23:50,598
Do you want to end up like
these two knucklehead grunts
on a permanent ripper?
247
00:23:50,765 --> 00:23:53,433
Find yourself another family.
The door's right there.
248
00:24:07,081 --> 00:24:08,115
Hey.
249
00:24:09,216 --> 00:24:10,851
You know your mother loves you.
250
00:24:12,219 --> 00:24:13,788
We're the knucklehead
grunts here.
251
00:24:21,429 --> 00:24:24,131
Was that you?
Was that you? Who was that?
252
00:24:24,265 --> 00:24:25,866
That was you.
253
00:24:26,033 --> 00:24:27,868
That was Uncle Darryl.
254
00:24:28,002 --> 00:24:30,171
No, I would never.
255
00:25:54,555 --> 00:25:55,790
We're going to be
late to school.
256
00:25:55,956 --> 00:25:57,291
- Again.
- Okay.
257
00:25:58,426 --> 00:26:00,094
I'm just gonna make
one pit stop.
258
00:26:00,261 --> 00:26:02,663
Like I said, I'm always quick.
You know I'm always quick.
259
00:26:04,698 --> 00:26:06,434
Are you at least gonna shave?
260
00:26:06,600 --> 00:26:08,836
-Wow.
-Don't shave.
261
00:26:09,003 --> 00:26:10,539
I like your beard.
262
00:26:10,704 --> 00:26:14,075
-It's the best part of you, Dad.
-Oh, thank you, Izzy.
263
00:26:14,241 --> 00:26:16,710
What if I keep it just for you?
Yeah?
264
00:26:16,877 --> 00:26:18,212
You want me
to keep it just for you?
265
00:26:18,379 --> 00:26:19,613
All right,
let's get you ready, girls.
266
00:26:19,780 --> 00:26:20,881
Come on.
267
00:26:38,499 --> 00:26:39,500
Should we reschedule this?
268
00:26:43,637 --> 00:26:45,507
Sorry, long line to take a leak.
269
00:26:49,710 --> 00:26:50,911
Nice shirt, Cal.
270
00:27:00,754 --> 00:27:01,789
There it is.
271
00:27:08,796 --> 00:27:10,798
Your Honor,
at the time of the altercation
272
00:27:10,965 --> 00:27:13,868
- and subsequent assault
on the victim--
273
00:27:16,505 --> 00:27:17,972
Excuse me, Your Honor.
274
00:27:18,139 --> 00:27:20,374
Sergeant Clarence O'Riordan,
badge number 1922.
275
00:27:20,908 --> 00:27:22,243
I'm the arresting officer.
276
00:27:22,376 --> 00:27:23,644
Have a seat.
277
00:27:23,811 --> 00:27:24,979
And lock the door.
278
00:27:34,155 --> 00:27:36,423
Your Honor,
at the time of the altercation
279
00:27:36,591 --> 00:27:38,792
and subsequent assault
on the victim,
280
00:27:38,959 --> 00:27:41,795
the defendant had antipsychotic
drugs in his system,
281
00:27:41,962 --> 00:27:43,632
Seroquel and Risperdal,
282
00:27:43,797 --> 00:27:46,800
antidepressants
Zoloft and Paxil,
283
00:27:46,967 --> 00:27:49,370
in addition to Oxycodone
and Valium.
284
00:27:51,372 --> 00:27:53,407
Does the defendant
have any priors?
285
00:27:53,575 --> 00:27:55,242
He certainly does.
286
00:27:57,512 --> 00:28:01,015
May 2014,
public intoxication, DUI.
287
00:28:01,882 --> 00:28:04,919
June 2015,
resisting arrest, assault.
288
00:28:05,452 --> 00:28:08,422
September 2017, pink-papered,
289
00:28:08,590 --> 00:28:11,325
put on suicide watch
after a neighbor found him
in the garage,
290
00:28:11,492 --> 00:28:13,928
passed out,
with the vehicle running.
291
00:28:14,094 --> 00:28:18,499
Your Honor, my client has served
this country honorably.
292
00:28:18,667 --> 00:28:20,602
He has been awarded
a Purple Heart
293
00:28:20,768 --> 00:28:23,037
and a Bronze Star Medal
for his combat service.
294
00:28:23,204 --> 00:28:26,373
May I remind counsel that this
is not a Miss Universe pageant?
295
00:28:26,541 --> 00:28:28,209
Your Honor, if I may.
296
00:28:28,976 --> 00:28:30,579
I have
Mr. Cole's medical records
297
00:28:30,744 --> 00:28:32,880
dating from his first
traumatic brain injury
298
00:28:33,047 --> 00:28:35,082
to his fifth in 2013.
299
00:28:51,832 --> 00:28:53,767
Your Honor,
Mr. Cole's records show
300
00:28:53,934 --> 00:28:55,869
that he suffers
from memory loss,
301
00:28:56,036 --> 00:28:58,405
persistent migraines
and seizures,
302
00:28:58,573 --> 00:29:01,008
all of which
he is prescribed medication for
303
00:29:01,175 --> 00:29:02,577
by the state of Massachusetts.
304
00:29:02,743 --> 00:29:05,846
We would request
a deferred adjudication
305
00:29:06,013 --> 00:29:07,515
based on his medical history,
306
00:29:07,682 --> 00:29:10,284
with post-traumatic stress
from military service
307
00:29:10,451 --> 00:29:12,052
as a mitigating factor.
308
00:29:29,303 --> 00:29:31,839
Your Honor, my client
is willing to drop the charges
309
00:29:32,006 --> 00:29:36,243
contingent upon
the defendant agreeing
to attend rehabilitation.
310
00:29:38,713 --> 00:29:40,881
Is the defendant agreeable?
311
00:29:44,753 --> 00:29:46,621
Yes, Your Honor, he is.
312
00:29:50,824 --> 00:29:52,259
I'm ordering you to undergo
313
00:29:52,426 --> 00:29:54,962
a 60-day outpatient
rehabilitation program.
314
00:29:55,129 --> 00:29:57,298
You will report back
to the court each week.
315
00:29:57,431 --> 00:29:59,266
If you fail
to abide by these terms,
316
00:29:59,500 --> 00:30:02,336
the court
will hold you in contempt
and you will be prosecuted.
317
00:30:02,469 --> 00:30:05,306
Thank you for your service
and good luck.
318
00:30:19,219 --> 00:30:21,488
Can I have your VA card, sir?
319
00:30:24,391 --> 00:30:27,729
Wow, I'm going to have to
put this on the wall of fame.
320
00:30:27,895 --> 00:30:29,063
Welcome back, Gunny.
321
00:30:29,229 --> 00:30:31,131
Card's expired.
322
00:30:31,298 --> 00:30:32,801
You'll have to come back
in the morning
when the registrar's open.
323
00:30:32,966 --> 00:30:34,368
Get it renewed.
324
00:30:34,536 --> 00:30:36,771
Actually, I'm just here
to see my daughter,
325
00:30:36,937 --> 00:30:38,205
Alice St. Germain.
326
00:30:38,372 --> 00:30:42,009
-Is she a patient?
-No, she works here.
327
00:30:42,176 --> 00:30:44,813
She could also be
under the name of Alice Cole.
328
00:30:44,978 --> 00:30:46,380
St. Germain...
329
00:30:47,014 --> 00:30:48,115
Is she expecting you?
330
00:30:52,219 --> 00:30:53,521
She's on nights this week.
331
00:30:53,688 --> 00:30:54,988
If you want to come back
after 10:00 p.m.
332
00:30:55,155 --> 00:30:57,625
Or I could take a message.
333
00:30:57,792 --> 00:30:59,661
No, I'm just saying hello.
334
00:30:59,828 --> 00:31:01,830
It's been a number of years.
Uh...
335
00:31:04,264 --> 00:31:05,299
I'll wait for her.
336
00:31:28,922 --> 00:31:30,124
Mr. St. Germain?
337
00:31:33,762 --> 00:31:35,530
Gunny? Sir?
338
00:31:39,166 --> 00:31:42,202
I'm sorry,
but your daughter is unable
to see you this evening.
339
00:31:42,369 --> 00:31:43,638
Oh, okay.
340
00:31:43,805 --> 00:31:47,074
I-- I can wait
or come back any time.
341
00:31:47,241 --> 00:31:51,378
Alice says that this is not
the proper place for a reunion.
342
00:31:52,781 --> 00:31:53,947
She said that?
343
00:31:56,083 --> 00:31:58,753
Well, if I could just
talk to her, maybe--
344
00:31:58,919 --> 00:32:02,222
I checked our system
and based on the condition
of discharge on your DD-214,
345
00:32:02,389 --> 00:32:04,726
you are not considered
a veteran.
346
00:32:04,893 --> 00:32:07,261
-What? Who says?
-I am so sorry, sir.
347
00:32:07,428 --> 00:32:09,263
But I'm going to have
to ask you to leave.
348
00:32:52,372 --> 00:32:54,909
It's about fucking time.
349
00:32:55,075 --> 00:32:56,343
Let's go.
350
00:33:02,784 --> 00:33:04,619
Jesus Christ.
351
00:33:07,555 --> 00:33:09,557
You're not one of them, uh...
352
00:33:09,724 --> 00:33:11,492
pervy coaches
353
00:33:11,659 --> 00:33:13,862
who's, like, secretly in love
with one of his players,
are you?
354
00:33:13,994 --> 00:33:16,129
I hate to disappoint,
but I'm not into dudes
355
00:33:16,296 --> 00:33:19,299
who get their beards
out of a trash can
at a Brazilian wax shop.
356
00:33:22,402 --> 00:33:23,538
We're gonna be late.
357
00:33:26,908 --> 00:33:28,843
And you reek like
a fucking gin mill.
358
00:33:40,955 --> 00:33:42,256
You ready?
359
00:33:42,422 --> 00:33:43,490
Yeah.
360
00:33:45,125 --> 00:33:48,061
Once a Shamrock,
always a winner.
361
00:34:10,050 --> 00:34:11,285
Miss Knox?
362
00:34:12,052 --> 00:34:13,120
You're late.
363
00:34:13,755 --> 00:34:14,722
Sorry.
364
00:34:14,889 --> 00:34:15,990
What's this?
365
00:34:16,925 --> 00:34:19,894
I baked a little something
for the class.
366
00:34:20,494 --> 00:34:23,463
Anyone ever tell you you never
feed the animals at the zoo?
367
00:34:24,264 --> 00:34:25,332
Good luck.
368
00:34:26,300 --> 00:34:27,367
Thanks.
369
00:34:41,214 --> 00:34:42,282
Are you kidding?
370
00:34:44,953 --> 00:34:46,621
I just got my teeth whitened.
371
00:34:51,926 --> 00:34:53,962
Mr. Cole, we're ready for you.
372
00:34:54,796 --> 00:34:57,331
"John works the night shift
at a factory,
373
00:34:57,497 --> 00:34:59,801
making $10 an hour.
374
00:34:59,968 --> 00:35:01,101
As he heads out the door,
375
00:35:01,268 --> 00:35:03,871
he notices
that his car has a flat.
376
00:35:04,038 --> 00:35:05,873
-He goes back inside--"
-No, no, no.
377
00:35:07,875 --> 00:35:08,977
Are you kidding me?
378
00:35:11,079 --> 00:35:12,513
Ten bucks an hour?
379
00:35:15,449 --> 00:35:17,619
It just sounds like
John's being exploited.
380
00:35:18,720 --> 00:35:19,921
Calvin.
381
00:35:20,855 --> 00:35:23,658
You just have
to repeat the story to
the best of your ability.
382
00:35:28,128 --> 00:35:29,262
Good morning.
383
00:35:32,033 --> 00:35:33,935
Welcome.
384
00:35:34,102 --> 00:35:36,671
Uh, my name is...
385
00:35:36,838 --> 00:35:41,141
Dr. Elecia Knox.
386
00:35:42,644 --> 00:35:47,515
I am a combat trauma specialist
in training,
387
00:35:47,682 --> 00:35:52,086
and I also volunteer at
the Veterans Crisis Hotline.
388
00:35:53,921 --> 00:35:54,989
Um...
389
00:35:56,289 --> 00:35:59,426
truth be told,
this is my first day, too,
390
00:35:59,594 --> 00:36:02,730
so it kind of gives us all
something in common.
391
00:36:03,463 --> 00:36:07,035
And I brought
some freshly baked muffins,
392
00:36:07,200 --> 00:36:08,503
my mother's recipe.
393
00:36:08,670 --> 00:36:09,871
You're welcome to--
394
00:36:10,038 --> 00:36:12,006
Good, good. Thanks.
395
00:36:20,948 --> 00:36:22,050
Um...
396
00:36:24,686 --> 00:36:26,621
Okay.
397
00:36:26,788 --> 00:36:27,922
All right.
398
00:36:38,766 --> 00:36:39,834
Wow.
399
00:36:41,769 --> 00:36:43,638
I never thought
I'd see you here.
400
00:36:45,673 --> 00:36:47,975
Never thought
I'd see you anywhere.
401
00:36:50,011 --> 00:36:51,979
I'm really glad
you had a change of heart.
402
00:36:52,580 --> 00:36:54,414
You know, just walking
through that door
403
00:36:54,582 --> 00:36:56,283
can be the longest
road travelled.
404
00:36:58,753 --> 00:36:59,854
Are you okay?
405
00:37:04,926 --> 00:37:05,993
Yeah.
406
00:37:07,762 --> 00:37:09,831
Hey, did you know
that your father got out?
407
00:37:11,264 --> 00:37:12,834
Because he stopped by the house.
408
00:37:13,668 --> 00:37:14,969
He's making his rounds.
409
00:37:18,139 --> 00:37:19,339
I always knew when he got out,
410
00:37:19,574 --> 00:37:21,374
he'd come
for Brandon's death benefit.
411
00:37:22,910 --> 00:37:25,980
If you see him,
just tell him not to ask for me.
412
00:37:26,514 --> 00:37:29,183
And if he comes back here,
he will be arrested.
413
00:37:29,349 --> 00:37:31,384
He's a dangerous man, Calvin.
414
00:37:33,588 --> 00:37:34,822
Be careful.
415
00:37:41,261 --> 00:37:42,864
He didn't know we had kids.
416
00:37:53,241 --> 00:37:54,407
I gotta get back to work.
417
00:37:57,344 --> 00:37:58,679
Take care of yourself, Cal.
418
00:38:10,323 --> 00:38:12,627
Miss Diaz's head
is going to explode.
419
00:38:12,794 --> 00:38:15,263
That woman grows horns
when she gets mad.
420
00:38:15,428 --> 00:38:16,998
-Daddy?
-Yes, honey?
421
00:38:17,131 --> 00:38:18,733
When can I blow my whistle?
422
00:38:18,866 --> 00:38:20,500
Well, how about
you blow it right now?
423
00:38:20,668 --> 00:38:22,203
There we go.
424
00:38:22,369 --> 00:38:24,539
I'll write you a note.
They always work.
425
00:38:24,705 --> 00:38:26,240
-Are they good at detention?
-Really?
426
00:38:26,406 --> 00:38:29,043
-My notes always work.
-"Oh, please excuse Sydney.
427
00:38:29,210 --> 00:38:30,978
"She had diarrhea
and her boots leaked."
428
00:38:31,145 --> 00:38:33,581
Okay, that was not my best,
but did it work?
429
00:38:35,216 --> 00:38:37,852
"Oh, no, Sydney had
her first menstrual cycle.
430
00:38:38,019 --> 00:38:40,855
"And due to
her emotional distress,
she couldn't come to class."
431
00:38:41,022 --> 00:38:42,990
Okay, that was a little edgy,
but were you complaining
432
00:38:43,157 --> 00:38:45,458
when you were at the prize
counter for Dave and Buster's?
433
00:38:45,593 --> 00:38:47,394
I haven't even had it yet, Dad.
434
00:38:48,996 --> 00:38:51,199
-Had what?
-Nothing.
435
00:39:05,012 --> 00:39:07,515
Hey, Patty,
give me forty on Keno,
436
00:39:07,682 --> 00:39:09,217
a roll of quarters
for the girls,
437
00:39:09,382 --> 00:39:12,019
and I'll take a pint of lager.
438
00:39:12,153 --> 00:39:14,922
- Sounds good.
- You girls give me your bags?
439
00:39:20,628 --> 00:39:21,762
Thanks.
440
00:39:30,972 --> 00:39:33,307
Oh, no, Mom.
Please tell me you didn't.
441
00:39:33,841 --> 00:39:37,211
No, I'm-- yes,
I'm sure her son is consistent,
442
00:39:37,377 --> 00:39:39,680
but I told you
that I'm not ready to date yet.
443
00:39:39,847 --> 00:39:43,551
I need to focus on my work
and on Cody, and I--
444
00:39:43,718 --> 00:39:46,621
Oh, I gotta go, okay?
I love you, Mom. Bye.
445
00:39:47,622 --> 00:39:49,757
-Good morning.
-Hi. Um...
446
00:39:52,927 --> 00:39:55,395
I'm here to see Dr. Elecia Knox.
447
00:39:55,563 --> 00:39:56,998
Oh, yes.
448
00:39:57,131 --> 00:39:58,199
Yes.
449
00:39:59,800 --> 00:40:00,868
Hi.
450
00:40:02,937 --> 00:40:04,906
Um, I guess
I'm supposed to give you that.
451
00:40:05,039 --> 00:40:06,240
Oh, yeah.
452
00:40:07,141 --> 00:40:08,876
Please,
make yourself comfortable.
453
00:40:15,616 --> 00:40:16,918
Okay.
454
00:40:17,084 --> 00:40:18,185
Oh.
455
00:40:21,756 --> 00:40:23,658
Oh, actually,
those are temporary.
456
00:40:23,824 --> 00:40:25,927
My grandson and I have...
457
00:40:26,093 --> 00:40:27,962
craft nights on Mondays.
458
00:40:28,129 --> 00:40:29,363
That's reassuring.
459
00:40:30,497 --> 00:40:31,699
You even certified?
460
00:40:31,866 --> 00:40:34,302
Well, I have
a work-study program,
461
00:40:34,467 --> 00:40:37,772
until they find
a placement for me.
462
00:40:38,306 --> 00:40:39,373
Why don't you sit down?
463
00:40:41,342 --> 00:40:43,911
Oh, that's what
my mom would call
464
00:40:44,078 --> 00:40:47,848
my wall of very expensive
art on layaway.
465
00:40:48,015 --> 00:40:51,451
A little late in the game
to be taking a whack at it,
don't you think?
466
00:40:53,621 --> 00:40:55,488
Well, why don't we get started?
467
00:40:56,090 --> 00:40:59,126
Now, I love this stuff.
468
00:40:59,293 --> 00:41:01,796
Sort of takes away the tension.
469
00:41:02,495 --> 00:41:04,799
Why don't you try it?
470
00:41:06,968 --> 00:41:08,202
Something funny?
471
00:41:11,105 --> 00:41:13,407
I just...
472
00:41:13,541 --> 00:41:16,243
I just let the courts think
that you're gonna fix me.
473
00:41:17,678 --> 00:41:19,814
Well...
474
00:41:19,947 --> 00:41:22,683
I hate to disappoint you,
but I can't fix you.
475
00:41:22,850 --> 00:41:25,720
You probably wanna change
your sales pitch there.
476
00:41:25,886 --> 00:41:27,888
Even if I could fix you,
477
00:41:28,055 --> 00:41:30,424
it would take away
your ownership
478
00:41:30,591 --> 00:41:33,861
of the problem, the solution,
and the moving on.
479
00:41:34,562 --> 00:41:37,031
That's your job, not mine.
480
00:41:37,198 --> 00:41:38,766
Who said I had a problem?
481
00:41:38,933 --> 00:41:40,434
Maybe you don't.
482
00:41:41,469 --> 00:41:44,538
But you're the only one here
under a court order.
483
00:41:45,539 --> 00:41:47,875
Now, I've scheduled you
484
00:41:48,042 --> 00:41:50,544
for an EMDR session today.
485
00:41:51,979 --> 00:41:54,915
But what I'd like you to do
is spend an hour
486
00:41:55,082 --> 00:41:58,119
writing out a timeline of...
487
00:41:58,252 --> 00:42:00,287
difficult memories in your life.
488
00:42:01,255 --> 00:42:03,657
Memories that caused you pain,
489
00:42:03,824 --> 00:42:05,693
fear, discomfort.
490
00:42:06,227 --> 00:42:07,828
You can start at childhood.
491
00:42:07,995 --> 00:42:11,665
Yeah, that, uh--
that sounds like a real hoot.
492
00:42:11,832 --> 00:42:14,835
Um, listen, I'm happy
to shoot the shit with you here.
493
00:42:14,969 --> 00:42:17,104
We can talk about
the Sox blowing it this year
494
00:42:17,271 --> 00:42:19,140
or whatever teen novel's
getting you hot,
495
00:42:19,306 --> 00:42:22,476
but you can't sit there
and pretend like
you have any fucking clue
496
00:42:22,643 --> 00:42:24,245
what it's like to be in combat.
497
00:42:25,012 --> 00:42:27,248
No. I can't.
498
00:42:28,382 --> 00:42:30,718
But what I do know
499
00:42:30,885 --> 00:42:34,989
is this field of work
that I've dedicated my life to
has helped a lot of people.
500
00:42:36,457 --> 00:42:38,392
You're not alone, Calvin.
501
00:42:39,160 --> 00:42:41,362
So take your time.
502
00:42:41,495 --> 00:42:42,630
All right?
503
00:42:43,397 --> 00:42:45,666
And bring this back to me
in about an hour.
504
00:43:08,489 --> 00:43:09,657
Yo, Darryl.
505
00:43:18,199 --> 00:43:20,801
Oh, were you waiting outside
with binoculars?
506
00:43:22,103 --> 00:43:24,638
Well, it's a little warped,
but I think it adds character.
507
00:43:24,805 --> 00:43:26,607
All right.
508
00:43:26,740 --> 00:43:28,510
-Honey.
-Hey.
509
00:43:28,742 --> 00:43:30,579
- It's your grumpy Uncle Tiger.
-Hi, Uncle Tiger.
510
00:43:30,711 --> 00:43:32,213
Hey. Wow.
511
00:43:32,379 --> 00:43:34,849
She really did take
everything in that divorce.
512
00:43:35,015 --> 00:43:37,519
Yeah, no shit.
She even took the curtains.
513
00:43:38,185 --> 00:43:39,521
At least she let you
keep the bird.
514
00:43:39,687 --> 00:43:40,754
Mm.
515
00:43:42,256 --> 00:43:43,257
Hey, you want a beer?
516
00:43:43,424 --> 00:43:44,992
Yeah, sure.
517
00:43:46,393 --> 00:43:47,928
Hey, what's his name?
518
00:43:48,095 --> 00:43:49,163
Bill.
519
00:43:49,964 --> 00:43:51,198
Bill the bird.
520
00:43:52,601 --> 00:43:53,667
Hi, Bill.
521
00:43:56,437 --> 00:43:59,039
-So how'd the interview go?
-Ugh, I'm 0 for seven.
522
00:43:59,206 --> 00:44:00,641
Here you go.
523
00:44:00,808 --> 00:44:03,144
Oh-ho, so you finally
met your match.
524
00:44:03,310 --> 00:44:04,378
-Yeah.
-Cheers, brother.
525
00:44:04,513 --> 00:44:05,913
Cheers.
526
00:44:06,080 --> 00:44:07,681
What are you feeding this guy?
Look at this.
527
00:44:07,915 --> 00:44:10,384
What do you want?
I did four tours.
528
00:44:10,519 --> 00:44:12,253
Of the Cheesecake Factory.
529
00:44:12,386 --> 00:44:14,523
Oh!
530
00:44:14,688 --> 00:44:15,956
You're gonna
do me like that?
531
00:44:16,123 --> 00:44:19,260
-Okay.
-Little spicy. Little spicy.
532
00:44:19,426 --> 00:44:20,629
That's a nice one, Tay.
533
00:44:20,794 --> 00:44:22,129
Why are you so grumpy,
Uncle Tiger?
534
00:44:22,263 --> 00:44:23,697
Is it 'cause you broke your arm?
535
00:44:25,099 --> 00:44:27,468
Um... no.
536
00:44:27,636 --> 00:44:28,769
No, I'm not grumpy.
537
00:44:28,936 --> 00:44:30,471
I kind of should
be grumpy, though.
538
00:44:30,639 --> 00:44:33,307
Having just lost
the National Arm Wrestling title
539
00:44:33,474 --> 00:44:34,675
to Nikolai Volkov.
540
00:44:34,842 --> 00:44:37,044
No way. What happened?
541
00:44:37,211 --> 00:44:38,647
The wrestler from the '80s?
542
00:44:41,782 --> 00:44:46,086
I was competing
in the Sam Adams Stroganoff
543
00:44:46,253 --> 00:44:48,389
National Arm Wrestling
Championship.
544
00:44:48,557 --> 00:44:51,992
It comes down to me
and the filthy Ruski.
545
00:44:52,126 --> 00:44:53,494
All right?
546
00:44:53,662 --> 00:44:55,930
And I'm right-handed,
so that's my go-to.
547
00:44:56,096 --> 00:44:59,601
And I'm thinking, all right,
but he was five steps
ahead of me, this guy.
548
00:44:59,767 --> 00:45:01,702
So I switch it up last minute.
549
00:45:02,203 --> 00:45:03,704
I go to the left.
550
00:45:03,871 --> 00:45:05,806
You see here, see how my
thumb's bigger right there?
551
00:45:05,973 --> 00:45:07,576
So I'm thinking
I'm going to go over the top,
552
00:45:07,741 --> 00:45:09,944
you know, and just...
...like that.
553
00:45:10,579 --> 00:45:12,547
But he already
had his own bag of tricks.
554
00:45:12,713 --> 00:45:13,881
So what'd you do?
555
00:45:14,715 --> 00:45:16,150
I ate his guts.
556
00:45:16,850 --> 00:45:20,254
Just like this.
557
00:45:20,421 --> 00:45:22,624
] All right, all right, all right.
That ain't it, bro.
558
00:45:22,823 --> 00:45:26,427
- Come on, you're making a mess.
- -All right, I got to hit the latrine.
559
00:45:28,796 --> 00:45:30,331
I'm gonna grab another beer.
560
00:45:32,032 --> 00:45:33,133
Daddy?
561
00:45:34,034 --> 00:45:36,605
Do you think you and Uncle Tiger
are going to hell?
562
00:45:38,105 --> 00:45:39,674
Why would you ask that?
Did someone say that to you?
563
00:45:39,840 --> 00:45:41,643
Mommy said
you both killed people.
564
00:45:41,809 --> 00:45:42,910
She said that?
565
00:45:45,980 --> 00:45:48,048
Jesus fucking Christ.
566
00:45:50,951 --> 00:45:53,287
What your mom seems to forget
is they were really bad guys.
567
00:45:53,454 --> 00:45:55,889
And Daddy and Uncle Tiger,
we didn't have a choice.
568
00:45:56,625 --> 00:45:57,925
They were gonna kill us.
569
00:45:58,092 --> 00:45:59,661
You won't go to hell for it?
570
00:46:05,533 --> 00:46:07,968
No, I don't think so.
571
00:46:09,770 --> 00:46:11,205
I mean, I hope not.
572
00:46:11,372 --> 00:46:12,507
I hope not either.
573
00:46:13,140 --> 00:46:15,543
Mommy said that
you can't be saved.
574
00:46:19,714 --> 00:46:21,583
Hey, brother,
I gotta bounce.
575
00:46:24,084 --> 00:46:26,086
-Already?
-Yeah, I got a few things
I got to do.
576
00:46:26,220 --> 00:46:27,421
It was good to see you, Tay.
577
00:46:27,589 --> 00:46:29,056
Good to see you too,
Uncle Tiger.
578
00:46:29,223 --> 00:46:30,457
I guess I'll walk you out.
579
00:46:32,426 --> 00:46:33,994
-Hey, thanks for coming by.
-Yeah.
580
00:46:34,161 --> 00:46:35,764
Of course.
581
00:46:35,929 --> 00:46:37,364
Yeah.
582
00:46:37,498 --> 00:46:38,767
Uh, hey.
583
00:46:43,871 --> 00:46:45,105
Okay.
584
00:46:45,239 --> 00:46:46,675
All right.
585
00:46:46,874 --> 00:46:48,409
Getting little jolly
Santa Claus.
586
00:47:08,962 --> 00:47:09,930
Hey.
587
00:47:10,097 --> 00:47:11,498
Hey.
588
00:47:11,666 --> 00:47:13,233
Uh...
589
00:47:13,367 --> 00:47:14,536
Sorry I'm late.
590
00:47:16,504 --> 00:47:18,372
This was a lot harder
than I thought.
591
00:47:19,406 --> 00:47:20,542
That's okay.
592
00:47:21,810 --> 00:47:23,977
Why don't you come in
and sit down?
593
00:47:32,721 --> 00:47:34,054
Let's get to it, shall we?
594
00:47:36,825 --> 00:47:38,292
Okay. Are you ready?
595
00:47:40,160 --> 00:47:41,730
Yeah.
596
00:47:41,895 --> 00:47:42,996
Okay.
597
00:47:45,966 --> 00:47:47,769
Now can you tell me
what you're hearing?
598
00:47:51,472 --> 00:47:53,140
It's like, uh...
599
00:47:53,307 --> 00:47:55,510
a beeping going
back and forth into my ears.
600
00:47:56,845 --> 00:47:58,580
And what are you feeling?
601
00:47:59,748 --> 00:48:00,782
Mmm.
602
00:48:02,116 --> 00:48:05,285
It's a, like,
a buzzing in my hands.
603
00:48:05,452 --> 00:48:07,354
Okay.
604
00:48:07,488 --> 00:48:09,724
Now, if it's all right with you,
605
00:48:09,923 --> 00:48:12,926
can we begin this one
that says rotten apple?
606
00:48:13,595 --> 00:48:15,396
Yeah. Uh...
607
00:48:17,931 --> 00:48:19,667
So that was around
the time that my mom
608
00:48:19,834 --> 00:48:22,504
first got sick
with cancer and...
609
00:48:23,605 --> 00:48:26,574
and my parents were going
through a pretty bad divorce.
610
00:48:28,242 --> 00:48:31,979
And I was just trying to do
something nice, you know, so...
611
00:48:32,146 --> 00:48:34,081
on my way home
from school one day,
612
00:48:34,248 --> 00:48:38,218
I picked this apple
off a tree, and I polished it
all nice, and...
613
00:48:38,385 --> 00:48:40,588
When I got home,
I gave it to my dad, and...
614
00:48:42,624 --> 00:48:44,057
He took a bite out of it...
615
00:48:45,492 --> 00:48:47,494
And he said, "Huh.
616
00:48:48,763 --> 00:48:50,532
"It's rotten.
617
00:48:50,665 --> 00:48:51,965
"Just like you."
618
00:48:55,335 --> 00:48:57,705
All right, now I'm going
to turn on the light. Okay?
619
00:48:57,872 --> 00:48:59,239
-Okay.
-All right?
620
00:49:05,580 --> 00:49:06,748
All right.
621
00:49:09,216 --> 00:49:11,452
That will help balance
both sides of your brain.
622
00:49:12,854 --> 00:49:14,722
Now just slow your breathing.
623
00:49:16,256 --> 00:49:17,157
I'm right here.
624
00:49:24,198 --> 00:49:26,500
All right, now I'm going to
turn it up higher.
625
00:49:37,177 --> 00:49:38,378
It's all right.
626
00:49:38,546 --> 00:49:39,714
Keep watching.
627
00:49:42,082 --> 00:49:43,751
Now, can you see
that little boy?
628
00:49:44,586 --> 00:49:45,553
Yeah.
629
00:49:45,720 --> 00:49:47,054
And how does he feel?
630
00:49:51,058 --> 00:49:52,125
Worthless.
631
00:49:53,460 --> 00:49:54,596
Like it's...
632
00:49:56,230 --> 00:49:58,499
It's all my fault that
they're getting divorced.
633
00:50:03,470 --> 00:50:05,472
It's all right.
634
00:50:13,480 --> 00:50:14,849
I'm right here, Calvin.
635
00:50:18,185 --> 00:50:20,354
Fucking tripping
fucking bullshit on me.
636
00:50:20,522 --> 00:50:22,489
-Calvin, no, listen now.
-This is a fucking amateur hour.
637
00:50:22,657 --> 00:50:25,259
- I ain't your fucking
science experiment, bitch.
638
00:50:25,425 --> 00:50:27,494
Oh, you disrespect me
like that one more time,
639
00:50:27,662 --> 00:50:30,632
and I will bounce your ass back
in front of a judge so fast,
640
00:50:30,798 --> 00:50:34,869
you'll spend your life looking
for a box full of fucks
that I don't give.
641
00:51:05,667 --> 00:51:08,002
If I wanted a friend,
I would've bought a goldfish.
642
00:51:12,674 --> 00:51:13,675
I went to see my daughter.
643
00:51:13,841 --> 00:51:15,242
Yeah, I know.
644
00:51:15,409 --> 00:51:16,511
Not a good move.
645
00:51:17,311 --> 00:51:18,846
You talk to her?
646
00:51:21,415 --> 00:51:22,951
You tell her about
her brother's letter?
647
00:51:23,116 --> 00:51:25,118
Yeah, she already
spoke to him before he passed.
648
00:51:25,285 --> 00:51:26,588
Look, she doesn't want
to see me,
649
00:51:26,754 --> 00:51:27,922
and she definitely
doesn't want to see you.
650
00:51:28,088 --> 00:51:29,389
So don't go into her work again
651
00:51:29,557 --> 00:51:30,758
unless you want to go
back to prison.
652
00:51:30,925 --> 00:51:32,492
Look, I think if
we just talk to her.
653
00:51:32,660 --> 00:51:35,462
No, no, no, not we.
You understand? Not we.
654
00:51:35,630 --> 00:51:36,965
I'm not going to help you
con your daughter
655
00:51:37,130 --> 00:51:38,666
out of your son's death money.
656
00:51:40,635 --> 00:51:42,102
Is that what you think this is?
657
00:51:44,104 --> 00:51:45,873
I don't want no damn money.
658
00:51:47,842 --> 00:51:49,510
I just want my family back.
659
00:51:52,179 --> 00:51:54,616
-I think you'd best
be on your way.
-Be on my way?
660
00:51:54,749 --> 00:51:56,416
I am on my way.
661
00:51:57,284 --> 00:51:59,053
To get my family back.
662
00:52:00,088 --> 00:52:02,389
You know what,
I think maybe it's time we took
663
00:52:02,557 --> 00:52:04,458
a little walk
into the lake of you.
664
00:52:05,059 --> 00:52:07,629
Might be surprised what
we find lying in the bottom.
665
00:52:09,931 --> 00:52:11,099
Good luck with that.
666
00:52:12,767 --> 00:52:14,368
You don't know what it's like...
667
00:52:17,505 --> 00:52:20,074
to lose everything you ever had,
everything you ever wanted,
668
00:52:20,240 --> 00:52:21,676
everything you ever loved.
669
00:52:23,911 --> 00:52:26,547
Your family,
your job, your home.
670
00:52:28,248 --> 00:52:29,449
Your dignity.
671
00:52:33,054 --> 00:52:37,457
To see your best friend
evaporate into pink mist.
672
00:52:37,592 --> 00:52:40,460
Women, children, burned alive.
673
00:52:42,329 --> 00:52:45,933
We came back, and they
spat on us at the airport.
674
00:52:48,036 --> 00:52:49,671
Threw rocks at us.
675
00:52:53,141 --> 00:52:54,676
"Exit out the back, Jack.
676
00:52:55,910 --> 00:52:57,645
"Your medals are in the mail."
677
00:52:58,913 --> 00:53:02,016
No homecoming parade,
no celebrations,
678
00:53:02,182 --> 00:53:05,753
no fancy names for shit.
679
00:53:05,887 --> 00:53:07,354
No fancy programs.
680
00:53:07,522 --> 00:53:09,023
You know what they called it?
681
00:53:09,157 --> 00:53:10,625
Shell shock.
682
00:53:11,324 --> 00:53:15,129
As in man the fuck up, nigga.
683
00:53:17,464 --> 00:53:19,667
You got no wound? Huh?
684
00:53:19,834 --> 00:53:21,536
Well, suck it up, buttercup.
685
00:53:23,004 --> 00:53:25,006
And they tell me
I'm not a veteran.
686
00:53:25,139 --> 00:53:27,307
I, me, I'm not a veteran!
687
00:53:28,843 --> 00:53:31,779
I did the job
they asked me to do.
688
00:53:32,547 --> 00:53:35,248
All we wanted
was a welcome home.
689
00:53:35,415 --> 00:53:36,483
That's it.
690
00:53:37,518 --> 00:53:38,586
Shame.
691
00:53:40,287 --> 00:53:41,421
The shame.
692
00:53:45,927 --> 00:53:48,295
Hey, don't you turn
your back on me.
693
00:53:48,462 --> 00:53:50,330
Turn around
and face me like a man.
694
00:53:52,033 --> 00:53:53,668
You knocked up my daughter...
695
00:53:55,036 --> 00:53:56,204
and leave.
696
00:53:57,304 --> 00:54:00,007
Where were you when my son
fighting for his last breath?
697
00:54:00,174 --> 00:54:02,877
- Huh?
- I was--
698
00:54:03,010 --> 00:54:04,545
I was right there with him.
699
00:54:04,712 --> 00:54:06,013
You ain't no killer.
700
00:54:06,180 --> 00:54:07,682
You're a tourist.
701
00:54:11,786 --> 00:54:13,621
Just do it. Do it.
702
00:54:27,769 --> 00:54:31,438
Hey,
you don't knock it off,
I'm gonna call the fucking cops.
703
00:54:31,606 --> 00:54:34,407
Get back in your
fucking house right now.
704
00:54:35,877 --> 00:54:37,344
Bunch of assholes.
705
00:54:40,148 --> 00:54:41,215
It's okay.
706
00:54:42,517 --> 00:54:43,684
It's okay.
707
00:54:43,851 --> 00:54:45,418
It's so cold.
708
00:54:45,586 --> 00:54:46,921
It's so cold.
709
00:54:48,589 --> 00:54:50,992
-Hey.
-Oh, God.
710
00:54:58,099 --> 00:54:59,734
Hey, Gunny.
711
00:54:59,867 --> 00:55:01,135
Where you been staying?
712
00:55:02,770 --> 00:55:04,138
Bus shelter.
713
00:55:08,176 --> 00:55:09,510
Park bench.
714
00:55:10,912 --> 00:55:12,647
Blew through
all the money that...
715
00:55:14,314 --> 00:55:16,784
Brandon left me,
that's all I had.
716
00:55:18,553 --> 00:55:20,121
You're welcome
to stay here, okay?
717
00:55:20,254 --> 00:55:21,421
But, uh...
718
00:55:24,091 --> 00:55:25,492
There's gotta be
some house rules.
719
00:55:25,660 --> 00:55:26,828
You understand?
720
00:55:30,731 --> 00:55:32,432
I don't know
how it was in the bucket,
721
00:55:32,600 --> 00:55:34,869
but you try any weird fucking
prison shit with me, you're out.
722
00:55:40,407 --> 00:55:42,009
Bathroom's first door
on the left.
723
00:55:44,812 --> 00:55:46,180
Help yourself to the fridge.
724
00:56:04,966 --> 00:56:06,634
How'd it go with Mr. Cole today?
725
00:56:07,835 --> 00:56:10,171
I'm... encouraged.
726
00:56:12,940 --> 00:56:15,543
If you can reach the boy,
you can heal the man.
727
00:56:17,044 --> 00:56:18,246
Night, Ms. Knox.
728
00:56:53,247 --> 00:56:54,949
Come on, that's it?
That's all you got?
729
00:56:55,182 --> 00:56:57,551
-Give me some kisses.
Give me some kisses.
-Come on.
730
00:56:58,586 --> 00:57:00,420
-Cole!
-Oh, Joe.
731
00:57:00,588 --> 00:57:02,256
Get the fuck out of here.
732
00:57:02,422 --> 00:57:04,325
-How you doing?
-Once a shamrock,
always a winner.
733
00:57:04,525 --> 00:57:07,762
Yeah, look at that.
I wore it on all my deployments.
734
00:57:07,929 --> 00:57:09,263
That's awesome.
735
00:57:09,429 --> 00:57:11,065
-Wow, it's been forever.
-Yeah.
736
00:57:11,232 --> 00:57:13,301
I remember looking for you
at the graduation,
737
00:57:13,466 --> 00:57:15,269
but the guys said
that they, uh...
738
00:57:15,468 --> 00:57:17,638
they said you got
sent out on a quick ship
right out of base.
739
00:57:17,838 --> 00:57:20,641
Right to the front
of the Ebola catcher.
That's a good memory.
740
00:57:21,474 --> 00:57:22,743
Right on.
741
00:57:22,910 --> 00:57:24,679
How you been, man?
You still skating?
742
00:57:24,845 --> 00:57:28,282
Uh, you know, I'm just kind of
in between gigs, you know?
743
00:57:28,448 --> 00:57:30,751
Just, uh... playing Mr. Mom,
744
00:57:30,918 --> 00:57:33,387
you know, while my wife
is finishing her residency.
745
00:57:35,756 --> 00:57:37,858
Hey, uh, let me buy you a drink.
746
00:57:38,025 --> 00:57:39,593
- I know, it's all right.
- No, come on. Have one.
747
00:57:39,760 --> 00:57:42,063
-Have one.
-We're having wings and sodas.
748
00:57:42,229 --> 00:57:44,999
You know, if the girls
need a ride, you can, uh...
749
00:57:45,132 --> 00:57:46,867
We're on foot. It's okay.
750
00:57:49,904 --> 00:57:52,373
I run a shinny league.
Wednesday nights.
751
00:57:52,540 --> 00:57:54,175
Come down,
you strap 'em on again.
752
00:57:55,743 --> 00:57:56,877
Door's always open.
753
00:57:57,044 --> 00:57:58,245
Yeah, I'll think about it.
754
00:57:59,714 --> 00:58:00,781
Good to see you.
755
00:58:01,749 --> 00:58:02,717
Better luck next time.
756
00:58:02,883 --> 00:58:04,251
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
757
00:58:06,887 --> 00:58:08,055
Cole.
758
00:58:09,590 --> 00:58:10,658
Thank you for your service.
759
00:58:14,295 --> 00:58:15,963
Thank you for
your fucking service.
760
00:58:36,917 --> 00:58:38,786
-Great job.
-Thanks.
761
00:58:38,953 --> 00:58:41,555
His name is Armando Flores.
762
00:58:41,722 --> 00:58:43,824
He's an RN,
and he works with your wife.
763
00:59:17,458 --> 00:59:18,726
Order up.
764
00:59:27,668 --> 00:59:29,970
Okay, ladies, here we go.
765
00:59:32,507 --> 00:59:34,308
All right,
I don't do house calls,
766
00:59:34,475 --> 00:59:36,377
so this better be
a fucking treat.
767
00:59:36,511 --> 00:59:38,245
I mean, how did you find me?
768
00:59:39,647 --> 00:59:41,215
It's on your apron.
769
00:59:42,450 --> 00:59:43,717
Is everything all right?
770
00:59:43,884 --> 00:59:45,419
It's okay.
771
00:59:46,620 --> 00:59:48,355
All right.
772
00:59:48,523 --> 00:59:49,890
You've got five minutes.
773
01:00:02,436 --> 01:00:04,371
Thank you.
774
01:00:11,546 --> 01:00:13,214
I don't know anything about you.
775
01:00:15,683 --> 01:00:17,751
I was born on the Cape
to loving parents.
776
01:00:17,918 --> 01:00:19,521
-I have a sister named...
-No.
777
01:00:19,687 --> 01:00:21,856
I want emotional collateral.
778
01:00:23,057 --> 01:00:24,892
You know, this isn't about me.
779
01:00:26,595 --> 01:00:27,828
This is about you.
780
01:00:28,496 --> 01:00:30,664
And if you want to get well,
781
01:00:30,831 --> 01:00:34,168
you've got to take
your treatment seriously
or stop wasting my time.
782
01:00:41,510 --> 01:00:42,710
There's two of me.
783
01:00:43,644 --> 01:00:45,212
There's Calvin,
784
01:00:45,379 --> 01:00:47,648
and there's the monster
that was created over there.
785
01:00:48,682 --> 01:00:50,918
You lose your morality
when you go to war.
786
01:00:51,785 --> 01:00:53,921
And part of that
teaches you how to kill...
787
01:00:55,122 --> 01:00:57,691
and another part
helps you survive.
788
01:00:57,858 --> 01:01:00,895
And the hard part
is coming back to a civilian...
789
01:01:01,996 --> 01:01:03,998
society that
doesn't have any idea
790
01:01:04,165 --> 01:01:05,600
what's going on in your head.
791
01:01:08,802 --> 01:01:12,139
Now, the rage,
the drugging, the drinking...
792
01:01:13,174 --> 01:01:14,375
that's normal.
793
01:01:15,743 --> 01:01:17,378
And I know
you don't feel normal.
794
01:01:19,180 --> 01:01:20,781
But it is normal.
795
01:01:21,882 --> 01:01:23,585
It's the trauma that wasn't.
796
01:01:24,885 --> 01:01:26,420
And all the noise in my head?
797
01:01:28,289 --> 01:01:29,390
Okay.
798
01:01:30,724 --> 01:01:32,726
I'm going to give you
a little exercise.
799
01:01:33,662 --> 01:01:34,828
It's called tapping.
800
01:01:36,063 --> 01:01:37,898
Now, when you get triggered
801
01:01:38,065 --> 01:01:42,002
and you get unwanted
thoughts in your head,
802
01:01:42,169 --> 01:01:44,539
you take two fingers
on both sides
803
01:01:44,705 --> 01:01:46,907
and you just tap...
804
01:01:47,041 --> 01:01:50,044
on the outer meridians
of your head.
805
01:01:50,211 --> 01:01:51,412
Just like that.
806
01:01:52,547 --> 01:01:54,348
Just gently.
807
01:01:54,516 --> 01:01:59,086
And it will calm down
the way your brain is working.
808
01:02:00,120 --> 01:02:01,388
I know it seems simple.
809
01:02:02,389 --> 01:02:03,490
Just try it.
810
01:02:05,492 --> 01:02:07,228
Yeah, just like that.
811
01:02:08,663 --> 01:02:09,797
Mm-hmm.
812
01:02:15,002 --> 01:02:16,103
All the way around.
813
01:02:18,105 --> 01:02:20,675
-I feel stupid.
-No, don't feel stupid.
814
01:02:22,243 --> 01:02:24,478
You can also do it on your hand.
815
01:02:24,646 --> 01:02:25,746
It's right there.
816
01:02:28,617 --> 01:02:29,883
There you go.
817
01:02:30,017 --> 01:02:31,418
Just like that.
818
01:02:32,621 --> 01:02:33,787
Simple.
819
01:02:35,389 --> 01:02:36,625
Listen.
820
01:02:38,993 --> 01:02:41,328
When you're ready...
821
01:02:42,963 --> 01:02:46,967
maybe you can tell me
why your timeline ends
four years ago.
822
01:02:48,502 --> 01:02:49,704
When you are...
823
01:02:50,971 --> 01:02:52,172
I'll be there to listen.
824
01:02:53,173 --> 01:02:54,241
Okay?
825
01:02:55,710 --> 01:02:57,378
I'm sorry about earlier today.
826
01:02:57,545 --> 01:02:58,713
Yeah.
827
01:03:00,180 --> 01:03:01,248
So am I.
828
01:03:07,921 --> 01:03:09,056
Hey.
829
01:03:10,124 --> 01:03:11,258
Whenever you're ready.
830
01:03:26,273 --> 01:03:28,409
Where'd you say you got
this piece of shit from?
831
01:03:28,576 --> 01:03:31,011
Uh, an old friend of mine
owns this place.
832
01:03:31,178 --> 01:03:33,515
He said if we unload
833
01:03:33,682 --> 01:03:35,249
some stuff for him,
he'd give me a job.
834
01:03:35,416 --> 01:03:37,519
Maybe I can buy
that truck from him.
835
01:03:37,686 --> 01:03:39,688
This frozen banana?
836
01:03:39,853 --> 01:03:41,188
Yeah, it is a little bright,
ain't it?
837
01:03:41,355 --> 01:03:43,658
I'm getting
a sunburn from this thing.
838
01:03:43,824 --> 01:03:45,459
What, you don't like the color?
839
01:03:48,462 --> 01:03:50,831
You get a job digging
ditches in them chukkas?
840
01:03:51,666 --> 01:03:54,034
What are you talking about?
I love these things.
841
01:03:54,201 --> 01:03:57,471
Hey, look, every real Marine
842
01:03:57,639 --> 01:04:00,474
drives these black Cadillacs.
843
01:04:01,543 --> 01:04:03,678
You look like
Saturday Night Fever
in those things.
844
01:04:03,844 --> 01:04:05,580
Well, I don't know
how you Army grunts do it,
845
01:04:05,747 --> 01:04:09,751
but every real Marine
takes a walk on the wild side.
846
01:04:18,892 --> 01:04:20,327
What's she like, my daughter?
847
01:04:22,896 --> 01:04:26,100
She's one of the most wonderful
people I've ever met in my life.
848
01:04:28,001 --> 01:04:30,137
Yeah, you don't speak,
you don't see your children.
849
01:04:30,304 --> 01:04:32,139
Still wearing a wedding ring.
850
01:04:35,309 --> 01:04:36,544
Yeah.
851
01:04:40,582 --> 01:04:42,617
I think that's the way
she kind of likes it.
852
01:04:44,952 --> 01:04:48,757
And what about you,
you know, all that time away
from your family, locked up.
853
01:04:49,824 --> 01:04:50,924
Was that worth it?
854
01:04:56,263 --> 01:04:59,500
It was my last week
running drills at Parris Island.
855
01:05:01,870 --> 01:05:03,505
Me and Gloria
were set to move back here
856
01:05:03,671 --> 01:05:05,906
with the kids,
be closer to our family.
857
01:05:09,209 --> 01:05:10,377
And there she was.
858
01:05:11,713 --> 01:05:13,147
my old nurse from De Nang--
859
01:05:14,181 --> 01:05:15,449
working as a desk clerk.
860
01:05:16,885 --> 01:05:18,820
She was coming, I was going.
861
01:05:19,420 --> 01:05:22,156
So we agreed to meet off base.
862
01:05:23,525 --> 01:05:26,960
Had a few too many drinks
trying to figure out
what this thing was.
863
01:05:27,127 --> 01:05:29,664
When a couple of locals
followed us outside.
864
01:05:30,565 --> 01:05:33,635
Next thing I know,
I'm getting stomped
by five guys.
865
01:05:33,802 --> 01:05:35,537
Yeah.
866
01:05:35,703 --> 01:05:37,772
So she tries to stop 'em.
867
01:05:37,938 --> 01:05:40,842
Gets hit. I get up,
push one of them off.
868
01:05:41,008 --> 01:05:43,343
He falls back
over his own damn feet.
869
01:05:43,511 --> 01:05:45,747
Splits his head open
on the parking curb.
870
01:05:45,880 --> 01:05:47,247
Died instantly.
871
01:05:49,249 --> 01:05:51,853
Now you gotta understand,
back then in the South...
872
01:05:54,556 --> 01:05:57,057
dealing with somebody
outside your own race...
873
01:05:59,493 --> 01:06:02,329
...Oh man, that was dangerous.
874
01:06:02,496 --> 01:06:04,031
Especially for a married man.
875
01:06:04,599 --> 01:06:07,367
Judge never saw it
as a hate crime.
876
01:06:07,936 --> 01:06:09,771
I get court-martialed.
877
01:06:09,938 --> 01:06:11,338
Stripped of all my medals.
878
01:06:13,541 --> 01:06:15,510
I get 25 years to life.
879
01:06:20,414 --> 01:06:21,783
Yeah.
880
01:06:21,950 --> 01:06:23,685
25 years in the Corps.
881
01:06:24,619 --> 01:06:27,087
Another 30
locked up in Leavenworth.
882
01:06:27,254 --> 01:06:30,925
And they ask me,
am I rehabilitated?
883
01:06:36,965 --> 01:06:38,633
My pain is relative, son.
884
01:06:41,001 --> 01:06:43,003
Sometimes we gotta fall apart...
885
01:06:44,539 --> 01:06:46,808
to find ourselves
all over again.
886
01:07:07,227 --> 01:07:09,496
You just had to ask her.
887
01:07:10,798 --> 01:07:14,134
I'll be the greatest hero
to lead Scotland to freedom.
888
01:07:14,301 --> 01:07:16,270
And you and Uncle Tiger
can be ballet dancers.
889
01:07:16,436 --> 01:07:18,006
Whoa, whoa, hold on, dude.
890
01:07:18,171 --> 01:07:20,575
Did she say
ballet dancers or ballerinas?
891
01:07:20,742 --> 01:07:22,409
Because I'm pretty sure
the ballet dudes,
892
01:07:22,577 --> 01:07:24,812
they don't wear
tiaras and tutus.
893
01:07:24,979 --> 01:07:27,414
Oh, shit. My bad.
894
01:07:27,582 --> 01:07:29,283
Oh, God.
895
01:07:30,450 --> 01:07:32,620
You know, Crystal's at it
with the lawyers again.
896
01:07:32,787 --> 01:07:34,556
She got me doing
couples therapy so they know
897
01:07:34,722 --> 01:07:36,223
every card to play in court.
898
01:07:37,391 --> 01:07:39,459
She garnished my wages
and took my connection pay.
899
01:07:39,627 --> 01:07:42,262
They're talking
full custody now.
900
01:07:42,396 --> 01:07:43,932
Full custody based on what?
901
01:07:45,432 --> 01:07:47,936
They're saying
I'm not medically fit
to take care of her needs?
902
01:07:48,101 --> 01:07:50,939
Not medically fit?
- Yeah.
903
01:07:52,607 --> 01:07:54,474
How many guys you know
that take a blast
904
01:07:54,642 --> 01:07:56,578
from a 70-year-old Russian frag
905
01:07:56,711 --> 01:07:58,378
and fucking live
to tell the story.
906
01:07:58,546 --> 01:08:01,315
Yeah, and I'm still finding
shrapnel in my morning crispies.
907
01:08:01,448 --> 01:08:02,717
Snap, crackle, pop.
908
01:08:02,884 --> 01:08:04,686
Boom.
909
01:08:04,852 --> 01:08:07,555
Okay, I'm gonna take
Taylor up a couple more houses.
910
01:08:07,722 --> 01:08:10,992
Then we gotta go home
and rehearse this
dance number for a talent show.
911
01:08:11,158 --> 01:08:12,660
-Peace, brother.
-All right.
912
01:08:12,827 --> 01:08:15,429
Come on, girl, let's go
get our dancing shoes on.
913
01:08:17,665 --> 01:08:19,266
Stop!
914
01:08:19,433 --> 01:08:22,469
-Your costume's so dumb.
-Yeah, what even is that?
915
01:08:22,637 --> 01:08:24,806
- Hey, stop.
- Oh, my God, someone's coming.
916
01:08:24,973 --> 01:08:26,406
-What are you doing?
-Let's get out of here.
917
01:08:26,574 --> 01:08:28,543
Hey, stop!
918
01:08:34,348 --> 01:08:35,617
Are you okay?
919
01:08:36,951 --> 01:08:38,285
Here, let me help you.
920
01:08:40,722 --> 01:08:42,122
Dad?
921
01:08:42,289 --> 01:08:43,591
Sydney?
922
01:08:47,061 --> 01:08:48,896
No, no, no, no. Please, stop.
923
01:08:49,063 --> 01:08:51,431
-What do you want?
-I just want to
talk to you, please.
924
01:08:51,599 --> 01:08:53,635
-You ruined my life.
-I know, and I'm so sorry.
925
01:08:53,801 --> 01:08:55,168
We should have went to school.
926
01:08:55,335 --> 01:08:57,270
-I know. I--
-We stayed at the bar.
927
01:08:57,505 --> 01:08:59,874
I know, and I live
with that regret every day.
You have no idea.
928
01:09:00,008 --> 01:09:01,576
You're not the only one
who has to go through this.
929
01:09:01,743 --> 01:09:04,411
Please, come here. Come here.
930
01:09:06,179 --> 01:09:08,549
I hate you, I was so mean
to her that morning.
931
01:09:09,383 --> 01:09:11,519
Your sister loves you,
and you know that.
932
01:09:11,686 --> 01:09:14,122
-Please.
-You're such a piece of shit.
933
01:09:15,222 --> 01:09:16,490
I'm so sorry.
934
01:09:17,457 --> 01:09:18,893
Leave me alone.
935
01:09:31,338 --> 01:09:32,674
Whenever you're ready.
936
01:09:35,977 --> 01:09:37,812
I was never idealistic,
you know?
937
01:09:41,248 --> 01:09:43,283
I never watched
Saving Private Ryan
938
01:09:43,450 --> 01:09:46,888
or Full Metal Jacket
and was like, that's me.
939
01:09:47,021 --> 01:09:48,288
Like, I gotta do that.
940
01:09:49,891 --> 01:09:51,793
You know, I...
941
01:09:51,959 --> 01:09:54,461
I think I just wanted to be
one of the good guys, you know?
942
01:09:54,629 --> 01:09:56,798
Just go over there
and protect my brothers.
943
01:10:00,200 --> 01:10:03,871
To be fair, you know,
most of us were broke,
944
01:10:04,038 --> 01:10:05,940
had shit going on, you know?
945
01:10:06,708 --> 01:10:09,644
When you ain't got nothing,
you ain't got nothing to lose.
946
01:10:11,746 --> 01:10:12,980
Were you...
947
01:10:14,182 --> 01:10:15,516
Were you afraid?
948
01:10:17,952 --> 01:10:19,219
Fuck yeah.
949
01:10:20,387 --> 01:10:22,924
You know, you don't go
hopping through people's
backyards in my hood
950
01:10:23,091 --> 01:10:26,928
in the middle of the night
unless you want to get shot,
so I figured, you know...
951
01:10:27,095 --> 01:10:30,464
I mean, like, why should
this be any different?
952
01:10:33,000 --> 01:10:35,136
And the thing is, is that
953
01:10:35,302 --> 01:10:37,705
nobody thinks
it's gonna be them.
954
01:10:40,908 --> 01:10:44,078
I mean,
certainly not until the...
955
01:10:44,244 --> 01:10:47,014
Gate on the bird comes down
and you see the terrain
956
01:10:47,181 --> 01:10:49,584
and you feel the heat
on your face, smell the air.
957
01:10:50,685 --> 01:10:52,285
It becomes pretty fucking real.
958
01:10:58,826 --> 01:11:00,360
It's just...
959
01:11:00,528 --> 01:11:01,996
it's just not what you think
it's gonna be like,
960
01:11:02,130 --> 01:11:04,632
and maybe that's just life,
961
01:11:04,799 --> 01:11:07,969
but it couldn't be further
from those glossy commercials
962
01:11:08,136 --> 01:11:10,872
of be all you can be, you know?
963
01:11:13,674 --> 01:11:15,076
But look, I...
964
01:11:16,811 --> 01:11:18,445
I didn't want to kill anybody...
965
01:11:19,180 --> 01:11:20,848
If that's what you're thinking.
966
01:11:24,051 --> 01:11:25,753
That never crossed my mind.
967
01:11:39,967 --> 01:11:43,037
It was one of
our first missions as a unit.
968
01:11:44,939 --> 01:11:48,209
And the intel from inside
the village was that there
was 20 known targets
969
01:11:48,375 --> 01:11:50,845
trying to hide caches
of large weapons,
970
01:11:51,012 --> 01:11:52,880
you know,
in these tunnel systems.
971
01:11:53,047 --> 01:11:55,750
It was like Viet Cong shit.
972
01:11:56,951 --> 01:11:58,186
It was fucking scary.
973
01:12:01,388 --> 01:12:05,392
So we dropped flyers on
all the villages, homes and...
974
01:12:07,595 --> 01:12:11,666
and any military-age man
that was left behind
would be suspect.
975
01:12:13,301 --> 01:12:14,836
By the time
we were boots on the ground,
976
01:12:15,002 --> 01:12:18,338
we had lost 0-dark-hundred,
meaning that our plan
977
01:12:18,506 --> 01:12:21,509
to get in and out before
sunrise had gone to shit.
978
01:12:22,375 --> 01:12:26,581
So this was gonna become
very dangerous
very quick for us.
979
01:12:29,116 --> 01:12:32,385
Uh, we breached
the first few homes.
980
01:12:34,021 --> 01:12:36,924
It was just mostly
women, children,
981
01:12:37,091 --> 01:12:38,659
some elderly people, you know.
982
01:12:40,328 --> 01:12:42,997
And I think
we started to think, like,
983
01:12:43,164 --> 01:12:45,666
maybe we are winning
their hearts and minds.
984
01:12:46,767 --> 01:12:49,804
Maybe-- maybe all this time that
we've been in this country...
985
01:12:52,106 --> 01:12:53,307
meant something.
986
01:12:54,508 --> 01:12:55,710
And that's when I...
987
01:12:57,511 --> 01:13:00,548
Came upon
this six-foot cinderblock
sheep pen wall, and...
988
01:13:05,753 --> 01:13:07,788
I knew
we weren't all coming back.
989
01:13:09,690 --> 01:13:10,791
Why is that?
990
01:13:11,826 --> 01:13:13,794
There was this
two-foot crack in the wall.
991
01:13:16,163 --> 01:13:17,765
And within those two feet...
992
01:13:20,500 --> 01:13:21,936
I knew it was gonna be bad.
993
01:13:24,305 --> 01:13:25,472
It was just...
994
01:13:28,643 --> 01:13:29,877
Evil.
995
01:13:31,245 --> 01:13:32,747
Ominous, you know.
996
01:13:33,848 --> 01:13:35,016
Just...
997
01:13:36,183 --> 01:13:37,685
You could feel it in your soul,
998
01:13:37,852 --> 01:13:39,854
just, like,
sucking it like a vacuum.
999
01:13:43,124 --> 01:13:44,926
I...
1000
01:13:45,059 --> 01:13:48,129
I continued on, breaching doors.
1001
01:13:49,997 --> 01:13:51,464
Got to a few more village homes,
1002
01:13:51,632 --> 01:13:55,069
and that's when
Third Squad took contact.
1003
01:13:55,202 --> 01:13:58,606
We rushed to their position,
and sure enough,
there was Brandon,
1004
01:13:58,773 --> 01:14:01,642
trying to get into that pen
to get to our guys.
1005
01:14:02,977 --> 01:14:04,645
Our comms weren't working
well that day,
1006
01:14:04,812 --> 01:14:06,681
so I didn't have a signal,
and I had to call out to him,
1007
01:14:06,847 --> 01:14:08,950
and I said, "Don't go in there."
1008
01:14:11,252 --> 01:14:14,055
And he just--
he just turned to me...
1009
01:14:15,589 --> 01:14:17,091
And there was this...
1010
01:14:19,126 --> 01:14:20,995
This look on his face.
1011
01:14:23,297 --> 01:14:24,665
And it was like...
1012
01:14:26,801 --> 01:14:31,138
it was like the entire reason
that he was put on this Earth
1013
01:14:31,305 --> 01:14:34,508
was to go into that pen
after his men.
1014
01:14:36,544 --> 01:14:39,814
And that's when he went through
that two-foot crack in the wall,
1015
01:14:39,981 --> 01:14:41,248
and he never came back.
1016
01:14:42,550 --> 01:14:43,884
Did my son suffer?
1017
01:14:49,857 --> 01:14:51,158
A father's got to know.
1018
01:14:53,493 --> 01:14:55,930
I can only imagine it
a thousand times worse.
1019
01:15:00,868 --> 01:15:04,038
Brandon took ten AK rounds
and was grenaded by the enemy
1020
01:15:04,205 --> 01:15:06,507
who were hiding under
that thatch in the sheep pen.
1021
01:15:08,209 --> 01:15:11,078
When we got in there,
we smoked them pretty good.
1022
01:15:11,245 --> 01:15:14,048
Deacons and admins
were KIA, but...
1023
01:15:16,450 --> 01:15:17,952
Brandon was still alive.
1024
01:15:21,422 --> 01:15:25,259
I-- I performed
life-saving tourniquet,
1025
01:15:25,426 --> 01:15:29,330
quick clot, to stop the
bleeding, but he hadn't worn
his plates that day,
1026
01:15:29,497 --> 01:15:33,000
so he had sustained massive
trauma to his upper torso
1027
01:15:33,167 --> 01:15:35,136
and lower right side
from the shrapnel.
1028
01:15:38,507 --> 01:15:40,875
Your boy wasn't scared,
Mr. St. Germain.
1029
01:15:42,410 --> 01:15:43,644
He knew he was loved.
1030
01:15:50,885 --> 01:15:52,620
Brandon died...
1031
01:15:52,787 --> 01:15:55,790
right here, in between
these two village homes.
1032
01:15:56,924 --> 01:15:58,659
Six thousand
miles away from here.
1033
01:15:59,994 --> 01:16:02,163
Sorry I couldn't bring
your son home, sir.
1034
01:16:04,231 --> 01:16:05,866
I think I'll have
that drink now.
1035
01:16:14,375 --> 01:16:15,643
Buying or selling today?
1036
01:16:17,011 --> 01:16:18,179
Oh, I, uh...
1037
01:16:23,417 --> 01:16:24,485
Just these.
1038
01:16:29,790 --> 01:16:31,425
Are these yours?
1039
01:16:33,494 --> 01:16:34,628
Yes.
1040
01:16:37,431 --> 01:16:40,201
Under the Stolen Valor Act,
we can't buy these.
1041
01:16:42,837 --> 01:16:44,271
I tell you what.
1042
01:16:45,574 --> 01:16:48,142
How about I hang on to them
1043
01:16:48,309 --> 01:16:50,845
and whenever you're ready,
you come back and get 'em.
1044
01:17:12,666 --> 01:17:14,702
How much for this?
1045
01:17:20,441 --> 01:17:22,143
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Not too much, all right?
1046
01:17:22,309 --> 01:17:23,545
Don't take too much off.
1047
01:17:23,711 --> 01:17:25,012
I don't want
to look like a jarhead.
1048
01:17:25,179 --> 01:17:26,881
All right. Come on.
1049
01:17:27,047 --> 01:17:28,716
-Just relax, okay?
-Okay, okay.
1050
01:17:28,883 --> 01:17:30,384
I did all the shape-ups
in the bag.
1051
01:17:30,552 --> 01:17:32,521
All right, you know,
I'm just a little nervous.
1052
01:17:32,686 --> 01:17:35,422
-I know.
-Yeah, God.
1053
01:17:35,590 --> 01:17:37,324
My parole officer's
coming in a minute.
1054
01:17:39,093 --> 01:17:41,128
He put in a word for me
at the credit union.
1055
01:17:41,295 --> 01:17:43,664
I'm gonna take over
the payments for the truck.
1056
01:17:45,866 --> 01:17:47,434
All right. Okay.
1057
01:17:50,639 --> 01:17:52,173
-Just a sec.
-Okay.
1058
01:17:56,810 --> 01:17:58,647
-All right.
-All right.
1059
01:18:01,916 --> 01:18:03,184
Thanks. Thanks.
1060
01:18:06,187 --> 01:18:07,589
Got married in this thing.
1061
01:18:09,290 --> 01:18:10,891
I still got it or what?
1062
01:18:11,058 --> 01:18:12,561
Huh? How do I look?
1063
01:18:12,726 --> 01:18:14,795
Like you're playing for keeps.
1064
01:18:16,598 --> 01:18:19,200
All right, Mr. St. Germain.
1065
01:18:19,366 --> 01:18:23,137
If you could just sign
here, here,
1066
01:18:23,304 --> 01:18:26,240
and here, we should be all set.
1067
01:18:27,676 --> 01:18:31,145
The loan will be approved
pending the appeal of
your discharge status.
1068
01:18:32,846 --> 01:18:34,715
Okay.
1069
01:18:37,586 --> 01:18:39,954
I didn't want to say anything,
but you wouldn't happen to be
1070
01:18:40,120 --> 01:18:42,223
related to Alice St. Germain,
would you?
1071
01:18:42,389 --> 01:18:44,758
Yes, yes. That's my daughter.
1072
01:18:46,561 --> 01:18:49,631
I just want to extend
my sincerest condolences
to you, sir.
1073
01:18:50,798 --> 01:18:52,534
I know it's been some years now.
1074
01:18:52,701 --> 01:18:54,168
Oh. Look...
1075
01:18:55,369 --> 01:18:56,705
It's okay.
1076
01:18:58,105 --> 01:19:00,040
Brandon died doing
what he loved to do.
1077
01:19:02,009 --> 01:19:03,877
I'm sorry.
1078
01:19:04,011 --> 01:19:06,747
I meant Alice's
youngest daughter, Isabella.
1079
01:19:29,770 --> 01:19:30,938
Darryl?
1080
01:20:23,824 --> 01:20:25,225
Darryl?
1081
01:21:01,495 --> 01:21:03,163
You gonna take that drink,
soldier?
1082
01:21:04,733 --> 01:21:06,367
Or you gonna try
door number two?
1083
01:21:07,935 --> 01:21:09,503
Either way, same result.
1084
01:21:28,857 --> 01:21:30,825
Oh, I've seen that look.
1085
01:21:32,560 --> 01:21:33,795
This is it.
1086
01:21:35,129 --> 01:21:36,397
All or nothing.
1087
01:21:38,999 --> 01:21:40,467
I bet you wonder...
1088
01:21:42,503 --> 01:21:43,872
where's my tribe?
1089
01:21:47,441 --> 01:21:50,043
Man, I ain't talking about
no friendship, neither.
1090
01:21:50,210 --> 01:21:52,413
I'm talking about brotherhood.
1091
01:21:52,580 --> 01:21:53,882
The willingness
to give your life
1092
01:21:54,047 --> 01:21:56,350
for the one to your left
or to your right.
1093
01:21:56,518 --> 01:22:00,555
To put the welfare of the group
over your own and know...
1094
01:22:02,189 --> 01:22:04,291
they'd do the same for you
in an instant.
1095
01:22:06,493 --> 01:22:08,295
Where you gonna
find that back here?
1096
01:22:09,831 --> 01:22:12,767
There's no greater love
or intimacy.
1097
01:22:14,803 --> 01:22:16,638
Not for flag, not for country...
1098
01:22:18,205 --> 01:22:19,440
for glory.
1099
01:22:21,041 --> 01:22:22,409
Just for each other.
1100
01:22:30,117 --> 01:22:31,719
Semper fi.
1101
01:22:33,454 --> 01:22:35,088
Always faithful.
1102
01:23:00,615 --> 01:23:02,517
I know about my granddaughter.
1103
01:23:04,686 --> 01:23:06,320
That was a big one
to keep from me.
1104
01:23:07,087 --> 01:23:09,223
But I kept my secret
for 30 years, so...
1105
01:23:12,159 --> 01:23:14,629
I'm gonna give you a pass.
1106
01:23:14,762 --> 01:23:17,164
But just like me, I know
you're seeking redemption.
1107
01:23:18,833 --> 01:23:20,434
I can see it in your eyes.
1108
01:23:21,536 --> 01:23:23,103
You've walked
through the portal.
1109
01:23:24,204 --> 01:23:25,874
Seen the world unfiltered.
1110
01:23:27,174 --> 01:23:29,443
It's both
a blessing and a curse.
1111
01:23:30,077 --> 01:23:33,013
But we hold the line, son.
1112
01:23:33,180 --> 01:23:37,017
And whatever this is,
you have me.
1113
01:23:38,252 --> 01:23:39,721
Because I found my tribe.
1114
01:23:41,255 --> 01:23:42,690
And I ain't giving up on it.
1115
01:23:51,900 --> 01:23:53,367
Welcome to the awakening.
1116
01:23:57,204 --> 01:23:59,439
You know,
my Ma used to say
that the will of God
1117
01:23:59,607 --> 01:24:02,175
won't take you where the grace
of God won't protect you.
1118
01:24:03,377 --> 01:24:05,145
And in that moment,
1119
01:24:05,312 --> 01:24:07,849
I was praying to a God
I hadn't spoke to
in a long time.
1120
01:24:13,453 --> 01:24:15,289
I think I'm ready
to talk about Izzy.
1121
01:24:19,159 --> 01:24:21,896
Hmm. I'm gonna
go to the bathroom.
1122
01:24:22,062 --> 01:24:24,431
Just wait until
I finish this level.
1123
01:24:24,599 --> 01:24:26,133
I've never gotten this far.
1124
01:24:26,300 --> 01:24:27,367
Yes!
1125
01:24:40,915 --> 01:24:43,150
Hey, coach!
1126
01:24:43,283 --> 01:24:45,954
I just won ten grand.
How's that for good luck?
1127
01:24:46,119 --> 01:24:47,454
There you go, kid.
1128
01:24:47,622 --> 01:24:49,356
Next round's
on Target brand Matt Damon.
1129
01:25:08,475 --> 01:25:09,409
-Dad!
-Cash me out?
1130
01:25:09,577 --> 01:25:10,979
Dad! Dad!
1131
01:25:11,144 --> 01:25:12,680
I can't find Isabel.
1132
01:25:12,847 --> 01:25:14,048
She needed to go to the bathroom
1133
01:25:14,214 --> 01:25:15,482
and I told her
she could wait while
1134
01:25:15,650 --> 01:25:17,117
I play my game,
but she's not here.
1135
01:25:17,250 --> 01:25:18,553
No, no, no. It's okay.
1136
01:25:18,720 --> 01:25:19,386
She's gonna be somewhere.
We'll find her.
1137
01:25:19,520 --> 01:25:20,588
Don't worry.
1138
01:25:25,258 --> 01:25:26,661
Just stay right here, okay?
1139
01:25:26,828 --> 01:25:28,963
Just stay right here.
Just sit right there.
1140
01:25:33,701 --> 01:25:35,036
Izzy?
1141
01:25:41,009 --> 01:25:42,209
Isabella!
1142
01:25:50,551 --> 01:25:52,020
Izzy!
1143
01:25:54,454 --> 01:25:56,057
Izzy!
1144
01:25:56,223 --> 01:25:57,558
Have you seen a little,
she's girl about this tall,
1145
01:25:57,725 --> 01:25:59,259
she's got a pink jacket on?
1146
01:26:21,481 --> 01:26:22,617
Izzy!
1147
01:26:29,222 --> 01:26:30,658
Izzy!
1148
01:27:59,747 --> 01:28:00,848
Hi.
1149
01:28:03,283 --> 01:28:04,384
I'm Armando.
1150
01:28:12,560 --> 01:28:15,229
Alice and I are
in the same nursing program.
1151
01:28:20,768 --> 01:28:23,171
I'm sorry to meet you
under these circumstances.
1152
01:28:44,659 --> 01:28:46,093
Why don't you take a break?
1153
01:28:48,763 --> 01:28:50,731
Sydney's upstairs in her room.
1154
01:29:06,314 --> 01:29:07,748
Can I make you a plate of food?
1155
01:29:16,290 --> 01:29:17,490
Can I come in?
1156
01:29:22,362 --> 01:29:23,965
Can you at least speak
to me, Squid?
1157
01:29:27,969 --> 01:29:29,036
I have nothing to say.
1158
01:29:30,771 --> 01:29:32,707
Don't call me that anymore.
1159
01:30:06,674 --> 01:30:08,009
You're going through
a lot right now.
1160
01:30:08,175 --> 01:30:09,476
-You just need to stay calm.
-No, no.
1161
01:30:09,644 --> 01:30:11,679
I need to figure this out now.
1162
01:30:11,846 --> 01:30:13,681
Let me go.
1163
01:30:18,451 --> 01:30:19,553
Just calm down.
1164
01:30:20,221 --> 01:30:21,789
I think
she just needs some space, bro.
1165
01:30:21,956 --> 01:30:23,691
-What?
-I think
she just needs some space.
1166
01:30:23,858 --> 01:30:25,458
Hey! Hey! Hey! No!
1167
01:30:25,626 --> 01:30:26,761
She's my wife!
1168
01:30:26,928 --> 01:30:28,229
What the is wrong with you?
1169
01:30:28,396 --> 01:30:30,598
- Let go of me!
- Calm down!
1170
01:30:30,765 --> 01:30:32,533
Just let me fucking speak!
1171
01:30:44,477 --> 01:30:46,047
When Brandon
didn't make it home...
1172
01:30:47,748 --> 01:30:49,583
I weathered that storm with you.
1173
01:30:51,752 --> 01:30:52,954
You gave me no choice.
1174
01:30:54,055 --> 01:30:57,525
So I put aside my own grief,
1175
01:30:57,692 --> 01:30:59,727
my own suffering
of losing my brother...
1176
01:31:01,796 --> 01:31:03,931
the only family I ever had.
1177
01:31:04,098 --> 01:31:05,533
I did that for you.
1178
01:31:07,935 --> 01:31:09,103
And you too.
1179
01:31:09,971 --> 01:31:11,872
And your Tammy Faye wife.
1180
01:31:12,039 --> 01:31:14,275
And no, sweetie,
Jesus ain't getting you out
1181
01:31:14,442 --> 01:31:16,177
of this ratfuck
fuck mess either.
1182
01:31:19,880 --> 01:31:21,481
I thought that
was hitting bottom.
1183
01:31:24,218 --> 01:31:27,388
When you got back
from your last deployment...
1184
01:31:28,656 --> 01:31:30,424
I realized there was no bottom.
1185
01:31:32,660 --> 01:31:34,061
Something was different.
1186
01:31:35,663 --> 01:31:37,164
It wasn't that you'd changed.
1187
01:31:38,666 --> 01:31:40,134
You'd been replaced.
1188
01:31:40,301 --> 01:31:42,136
You refused to talk to me.
1189
01:31:43,471 --> 01:31:45,206
Or anyone else for that matter.
1190
01:31:46,841 --> 01:31:48,509
Every night
you would moan in your sleep.
1191
01:31:48,676 --> 01:31:51,345
You'd-- you'd walk around
the house talking to yourself.
1192
01:31:52,513 --> 01:31:54,081
You can't hold down a job.
1193
01:31:54,315 --> 01:31:56,684
If they don't fire you first
for being such a fuck-up.
1194
01:31:57,918 --> 01:32:00,354
And a danger to you
and everyone around you.
1195
01:32:03,224 --> 01:32:05,860
Do you know what it's like...
1196
01:32:05,993 --> 01:32:09,597
to be paralyzed every time
the phone rings...
1197
01:32:11,232 --> 01:32:12,400
hoping it's not the coroner
1198
01:32:12,566 --> 01:32:14,201
'cause they found
your dead body?
1199
01:32:17,872 --> 01:32:19,273
And then that call came.
1200
01:32:22,910 --> 01:32:24,812
But it wasn't you.
1201
01:32:30,785 --> 01:32:32,453
And I prayed to God it was.
1202
01:32:35,956 --> 01:32:38,159
And no one
in this room would disagree.
1203
01:32:48,602 --> 01:32:50,838
What are you
grateful for, Calvin?
1204
01:32:54,108 --> 01:32:56,010
Have you not been
listening to me?
1205
01:32:57,645 --> 01:33:01,015
You said that a friend came over
and saved your life last night.
1206
01:33:02,650 --> 01:33:04,785
Do you feel grateful
to them for being there
1207
01:33:04,952 --> 01:33:06,487
when you needed them the most?
1208
01:33:08,055 --> 01:33:09,123
Yeah.
1209
01:33:10,858 --> 01:33:11,926
Good.
1210
01:33:13,427 --> 01:33:14,495
What else?
1211
01:33:29,009 --> 01:33:30,377
I don't know. I guess I'm...
1212
01:33:31,912 --> 01:33:33,013
I'm here with you.
1213
01:33:36,417 --> 01:33:37,485
Yeah, you are.
1214
01:33:38,953 --> 01:33:40,387
What else?
1215
01:33:42,256 --> 01:33:45,392
Well, there's guys
I served with that I...
1216
01:33:46,393 --> 01:33:47,761
that I really miss.
1217
01:33:47,928 --> 01:33:49,897
You know, that I want to see.
1218
01:33:50,064 --> 01:33:53,367
Well, I bet they'd like
to see you, too.
1219
01:33:53,535 --> 01:33:55,035
I bet they miss you.
1220
01:33:56,837 --> 01:33:58,540
I mean, can you feel that?
1221
01:33:59,608 --> 01:34:01,909
Calvin, gratitude.
1222
01:34:03,477 --> 01:34:06,213
You can see it everywhere.
1223
01:34:06,814 --> 01:34:08,749
And it's there for you.
1224
01:34:08,916 --> 01:34:10,619
Just for you.
1225
01:34:10,784 --> 01:34:11,952
It's a gift.
1226
01:34:15,856 --> 01:34:17,791
I mean, it doesn't
really feel that way.
1227
01:34:17,958 --> 01:34:22,396
Well, do you want to be happy
or do you want to be right?
1228
01:34:23,998 --> 01:34:27,868
I mean, what is it
that you truly want, Calvin?
1229
01:34:34,675 --> 01:34:36,977
I just want to know
that it wasn't all for nothing.
1230
01:34:38,012 --> 01:34:39,079
Hmm.
1231
01:34:41,348 --> 01:34:43,184
I-- I just want to--
1232
01:34:43,350 --> 01:34:46,387
I don't know, wake up in
the morning and matter.
1233
01:34:48,523 --> 01:34:50,592
I want a relationship with
1234
01:34:50,758 --> 01:34:53,662
my daughter and her mother,
and I just...
1235
01:34:53,827 --> 01:34:56,430
I just want to wake up in
the morning and feel something.
1236
01:34:56,598 --> 01:34:58,567
Do you feel that
you deserve that?
1237
01:34:58,732 --> 01:34:59,800
No.
1238
01:35:07,975 --> 01:35:13,147
I want you to imagine
a 52-year-old freshman
in college...
1239
01:35:14,481 --> 01:35:18,620
waiting tables at night,
cleaning hotel rooms
1240
01:35:18,786 --> 01:35:20,421
on the weekends,
1241
01:35:20,589 --> 01:35:23,692
so she can come home
and take care of her grandson...
1242
01:35:26,794 --> 01:35:30,231
who's so heartbroken
that he asks her...
1243
01:35:31,732 --> 01:35:35,102
"Why didn't my daddy
love me enough to live?"
1244
01:35:36,337 --> 01:35:37,706
And you know what she's got?
1245
01:35:39,039 --> 01:35:41,475
"I don't know."
1246
01:35:43,410 --> 01:35:44,512
See...
1247
01:35:46,013 --> 01:35:47,414
My grandson, Cody...
1248
01:35:49,083 --> 01:35:52,253
His father was my son, Michael.
1249
01:35:55,222 --> 01:35:57,958
And his suicide...
1250
01:36:02,296 --> 01:36:05,600
...wasn't to end things
for getting worse.
1251
01:36:07,001 --> 01:36:09,638
What it did was it eliminated
1252
01:36:09,803 --> 01:36:13,440
the possibility
of things getting better.
1253
01:36:18,212 --> 01:36:21,348
It took everything that I had
1254
01:36:21,516 --> 01:36:24,586
to forgive him, but I did.
1255
01:36:26,420 --> 01:36:27,921
And I did because...
1256
01:36:30,124 --> 01:36:32,293
I had so much gratitude
for Cody.
1257
01:36:33,294 --> 01:36:34,629
He's a gift.
1258
01:36:36,130 --> 01:36:39,534
And because of him,
I started to...
1259
01:36:41,168 --> 01:36:44,004
look around in my life
for other gifts.
1260
01:36:45,339 --> 01:36:49,243
And what I found
was abundance...
1261
01:36:50,578 --> 01:36:55,650
and the strength
to learn how to take care of
1262
01:36:55,816 --> 01:36:58,720
other little boys
and little girls,
1263
01:36:58,886 --> 01:37:01,756
so their parents could come home
1264
01:37:01,922 --> 01:37:04,759
and say, "Baby..."
1265
01:37:04,892 --> 01:37:06,960
"...you are more than worth it."
1266
01:37:10,064 --> 01:37:11,465
You see, this place...
1267
01:37:13,735 --> 01:37:18,540
This place is meant to take you
from minus five to zero.
1268
01:37:20,841 --> 01:37:25,846
But what if you could live
on a higher level,
1269
01:37:26,013 --> 01:37:27,247
net positive.
1270
01:37:30,084 --> 01:37:31,185
PTG.
1271
01:37:32,453 --> 01:37:34,421
Post-traumatic growth.
1272
01:37:36,791 --> 01:37:39,259
You see, with loss,
1273
01:37:39,426 --> 01:37:41,161
traumatic loss...
1274
01:37:41,995 --> 01:37:43,565
is so painful.
1275
01:37:44,833 --> 01:37:47,802
And the pain leads to anger.
1276
01:37:48,636 --> 01:37:51,505
The anger leads to grit.
1277
01:37:52,172 --> 01:37:56,910
And with grit, you can survive
just about anything.
1278
01:37:58,078 --> 01:38:00,247
And you and I
both know about that.
1279
01:38:02,751 --> 01:38:07,187
Now, Calvin, you were willing to
give your life for your country.
1280
01:38:08,790 --> 01:38:12,893
Now maybe
you can try living for it.
1281
01:38:19,634 --> 01:38:20,702
Thanks.
1282
01:38:26,775 --> 01:38:29,243
-I'll see you tomorrow?
-Yeah.
1283
01:38:29,410 --> 01:38:30,512
Okay.
1284
01:38:44,925 --> 01:38:46,326
You wanted to see me?
1285
01:38:47,829 --> 01:38:49,496
This isn't a daycare.
1286
01:38:49,664 --> 01:38:51,432
I need you to be careful
with how much personal time
1287
01:38:51,599 --> 01:38:53,802
and emotional investment
you give a patient.
1288
01:38:54,636 --> 01:38:57,504
You're only here to provide
the tools, nothing more.
1289
01:38:59,641 --> 01:39:02,176
If you have patients believing
that you're Dumbo's feather
1290
01:39:02,342 --> 01:39:03,912
and you develop
compassion fatigue
1291
01:39:04,077 --> 01:39:06,748
and they drop the feather,
where will that leave you?
1292
01:39:06,881 --> 01:39:08,415
Where will that leave them?
1293
01:39:08,583 --> 01:39:09,784
I guess...
1294
01:39:11,084 --> 01:39:12,854
I become the system.
1295
01:39:14,889 --> 01:39:17,191
-Having lost your son...
-Wait a minute.
1296
01:39:17,357 --> 01:39:19,226
He has nothing to do with this.
1297
01:39:19,393 --> 01:39:22,329
He has everything to do
with the way you're treating
Mr. Cole.
1298
01:39:22,496 --> 01:39:25,667
I just want him
to know he's got a chance.
1299
01:39:26,601 --> 01:39:28,101
That there's hope.
1300
01:39:28,268 --> 01:39:30,304
Hope is the only thing
these men and women have,
1301
01:39:30,471 --> 01:39:34,174
and if you take that away,
they will become a statistic.
1302
01:39:38,011 --> 01:39:39,079
Oh.
1303
01:39:40,548 --> 01:39:41,649
Okay.
1304
01:39:44,451 --> 01:39:45,553
What's this?
1305
01:39:46,420 --> 01:39:49,958
These are all
of Mr. Cole's brain scans,
1306
01:39:50,123 --> 01:39:52,993
dating all the way back
to his first head trauma,
1307
01:39:53,126 --> 01:39:54,995
sustained during deployment.
1308
01:39:55,162 --> 01:39:57,899
I had neurology
compare his scans
1309
01:39:58,065 --> 01:40:00,100
with his neuropsych tests.
1310
01:40:00,267 --> 01:40:02,202
They were able to identify
1311
01:40:02,369 --> 01:40:05,172
the degenerate,
systematic patterns
1312
01:40:05,339 --> 01:40:09,844
that we now see in deceased
NFL players with CTE.
1313
01:40:10,010 --> 01:40:12,714
Difficulties
with impulse control,
1314
01:40:12,881 --> 01:40:15,817
decision-making,
volatile behavior,
1315
01:40:15,984 --> 01:40:21,255
symptoms we know
conclusively as a CTE diagnosis.
1316
01:40:22,957 --> 01:40:25,927
A diagnosis that can only be
made post-mortem.
1317
01:40:28,830 --> 01:40:29,964
When it's too late.
1318
01:40:38,338 --> 01:40:39,607
Hey, Cal, you getting that?
1319
01:40:54,121 --> 01:40:56,390
Hello? Cole residence.
1320
01:40:58,026 --> 01:40:59,761
Hi, is Calvin there?
1321
01:40:59,894 --> 01:41:04,231
Um, no,
he's indisposed at the moment.
1322
01:41:04,398 --> 01:41:06,634
Can I take a message
or have him call you back?
1323
01:41:08,435 --> 01:41:09,503
Whitney?
1324
01:41:10,605 --> 01:41:11,673
Is that you?
1325
01:41:13,675 --> 01:41:14,742
Uh...
1326
01:41:16,076 --> 01:41:18,913
yeah, yeah, this is him.
1327
01:41:23,083 --> 01:41:25,185
One of our friends passed.
1328
01:41:25,352 --> 01:41:28,121
- Yeah. Very sad.
- I just...
1329
01:41:28,288 --> 01:41:31,224
I just wanted to know if there
were any services planned.
1330
01:41:31,391 --> 01:41:34,261
Yeah, there's gonna be
a service, um...
1331
01:41:35,630 --> 01:41:37,765
Friday at noon.
1332
01:41:37,899 --> 01:41:40,267
Uh, St. Patrick's over on...
1333
01:41:40,434 --> 01:41:42,003
Yeah, I know where that is.
1334
01:41:42,169 --> 01:41:44,072
Just please let him know.
I hope it's okay.
1335
01:41:44,204 --> 01:41:45,640
We'd like to pay our respects.
1336
01:41:48,275 --> 01:41:49,711
Okay. I'll let him know.
1337
01:41:49,877 --> 01:41:53,014
I'm sure he'll be
glad to hear you coming.
1338
01:41:53,180 --> 01:41:56,383
- Thanks.
- Right. See you then.
1339
01:41:56,551 --> 01:41:59,087
Listen, we're having
a reception after...
1340
01:44:40,480 --> 01:44:41,549
Hey.
1341
01:44:42,750 --> 01:44:43,851
Um...
1342
01:44:44,919 --> 01:44:46,020
can I come in?
1343
01:44:59,667 --> 01:45:02,003
Your father wanted me
to give you these.
1344
01:45:03,470 --> 01:45:06,274
It plays really pretty music,
a little ballerina.
1345
01:45:06,439 --> 01:45:08,009
You just wind it up right there.
1346
01:45:16,050 --> 01:45:17,685
He also wanted
me to give you these.
1347
01:45:20,755 --> 01:45:25,092
These are
his medals from his service.
1348
01:45:25,226 --> 01:45:28,262
They only give those to people
who do something really brave.
1349
01:45:30,798 --> 01:45:32,300
Your father was a brave man.
1350
01:45:36,804 --> 01:45:38,873
He begged my mom
to move this year.
1351
01:45:40,274 --> 01:45:43,244
He told everyone so I could go
to a better school,
1352
01:45:43,376 --> 01:45:45,012
and maybe that's true.
1353
01:45:47,849 --> 01:45:50,051
But I think he needed to be
closer to you...
1354
01:45:51,118 --> 01:45:52,419
to feel safe.
1355
01:46:01,929 --> 01:46:03,130
Why are you doing that?
1356
01:46:07,301 --> 01:46:09,036
I just, um...
1357
01:46:09,203 --> 01:46:13,241
I just do it when I'm anxious
or when I'm scared.
1358
01:46:13,373 --> 01:46:15,375
It just helps to calm me.
1359
01:46:21,048 --> 01:46:24,151
I want you to know that
I loved your father very much.
1360
01:46:24,318 --> 01:46:27,188
If there's anything
that you ever need...
1361
01:46:27,355 --> 01:46:28,623
I'll be there.
1362
01:46:48,142 --> 01:46:50,144
So I'm thinking I'm probably
gonna head out next week
1363
01:46:50,311 --> 01:46:52,880
after the court signs off
on my last session.
1364
01:46:53,047 --> 01:46:55,883
Good. Signs off on what?
1365
01:46:58,085 --> 01:47:01,188
Oh. It's probably
a conversation for another time.
1366
01:47:02,790 --> 01:47:03,891
I was just gonna...
1367
01:47:05,059 --> 01:47:07,061
head out onto the open road,
1368
01:47:07,228 --> 01:47:08,796
you know,
see some of the country,
1369
01:47:08,963 --> 01:47:10,831
some of my guys, just kinda...
1370
01:47:11,966 --> 01:47:13,466
Get right with myself.
1371
01:47:13,634 --> 01:47:17,171
I was just thinking
we should probably talk.
1372
01:47:19,974 --> 01:47:21,542
Seems like
that's what we're doing.
1373
01:47:23,978 --> 01:47:25,746
Hey, you got a plan,
I understand.
1374
01:47:27,548 --> 01:47:29,917
I'll be out
by the time you get back.
1375
01:47:30,084 --> 01:47:31,585
No, that's not what I'm saying.
1376
01:47:31,752 --> 01:47:34,622
I was actually gonna
ask you if you were okay with...
1377
01:47:34,789 --> 01:47:37,558
you know, holding the fort.
1378
01:47:40,328 --> 01:47:42,163
Sure.
1379
01:47:43,831 --> 01:47:44,966
Sure. Um...
1380
01:47:46,701 --> 01:47:47,802
When you coming back?
1381
01:47:48,836 --> 01:47:50,171
Probably before Christmas.
1382
01:47:54,141 --> 01:47:56,510
Gotham still needs
its duo on that track.
1383
01:47:56,677 --> 01:47:59,347
Great.
1384
01:47:59,513 --> 01:48:03,617
Gives me a chance to work on
my holiday flan from the clink.
1385
01:48:03,751 --> 01:48:05,119
I'll be on the edge of my seat.
1386
01:48:09,757 --> 01:48:12,126
Painting your authentic self.
1387
01:48:16,330 --> 01:48:19,433
Let the brush become
an extension of your hand.
1388
01:48:21,335 --> 01:48:23,938
Finding your inner self.
1389
01:48:25,473 --> 01:48:27,641
Let each stroke...
1390
01:48:44,525 --> 01:48:46,093
You told me
I'd find you in here.
1391
01:48:49,230 --> 01:48:51,832
What did you do,
wrestle a unicorn?
1392
01:48:54,468 --> 01:48:56,637
That was always your joke
with the girls...
1393
01:48:56,804 --> 01:48:59,006
competing in
arm wrestling tournaments.
1394
01:49:00,341 --> 01:49:02,877
Yeah, I, uh,
I did an intro to dance,
1395
01:49:03,044 --> 01:49:04,345
so I decided to pick up a brush.
1396
01:49:04,513 --> 01:49:05,746
Wait, wait.
1397
01:49:06,714 --> 01:49:09,316
Dancing and painting?
Who are you?
1398
01:49:11,719 --> 01:49:12,853
Is that yours?
1399
01:49:13,921 --> 01:49:15,022
Might be.
1400
01:49:17,792 --> 01:49:19,894
-Yeah, it's top secret.
-Okay.
1401
01:49:20,995 --> 01:49:22,096
So...
1402
01:49:23,798 --> 01:49:25,499
how you been?
1403
01:49:25,666 --> 01:49:28,369
Uh, good.
1404
01:49:29,703 --> 01:49:31,939
Good, good. Yeah, um...
1405
01:49:33,508 --> 01:49:36,243
learning a lot
about myself, you know.
1406
01:49:37,645 --> 01:49:39,680
They, uh,
they said that the army
1407
01:49:39,847 --> 01:49:43,250
primed my noodle for combat,
but not for the civilian world,
you know.
1408
01:49:43,384 --> 01:49:45,520
They told me that I have...
1409
01:49:45,686 --> 01:49:47,455
no use for my frontal lobes,
1410
01:49:47,621 --> 01:49:51,092
which is the, uh,
the Bruce Banner
part of the brain,
1411
01:49:51,258 --> 01:49:54,495
you know, which has the, um,
inhibitory thoughts
1412
01:49:54,662 --> 01:49:58,732
to stop you from doing
crazy shit,
which is the Hulk part.
1413
01:50:01,368 --> 01:50:02,937
But I guess that's, uh...
1414
01:50:04,371 --> 01:50:06,508
I guess that's why
I could never decide on a flavor
1415
01:50:06,674 --> 01:50:08,709
when we took the girls
for ice cream.
1416
01:50:09,877 --> 01:50:12,012
That, and you'd threaten
to kill the kid
1417
01:50:12,179 --> 01:50:14,181
behind the counter
if you got impatient.
1418
01:50:15,883 --> 01:50:18,619
-Sorry.
-No, no, no, it's, it's okay.
It's-- that's fair.
1419
01:50:18,786 --> 01:50:20,721
So, yeah, I was thinking I'd do
1420
01:50:20,888 --> 01:50:25,326
some more courses here
and try to get my GED.
1421
01:50:26,794 --> 01:50:29,230
-Maybe use the GI Bill.
-That's great.
1422
01:50:29,396 --> 01:50:30,931
Mm, I keep rambling.
1423
01:50:31,098 --> 01:50:33,535
No, no, it's okay.
It's-- it's good.
1424
01:50:35,469 --> 01:50:37,138
It's the most
you've talked in years.
1425
01:50:45,246 --> 01:50:47,047
I see you're still hiding.
1426
01:50:51,553 --> 01:50:55,590
So what about you?
I mean, how's work going?
1427
01:50:55,756 --> 01:50:58,225
You know, it's really
fulfilling, actually.
1428
01:50:59,493 --> 01:51:02,796
I just, uh, took
a transfer to a VA in Vermont.
1429
01:51:02,963 --> 01:51:04,765
It's a promotion, actually.
1430
01:51:04,932 --> 01:51:06,667
Wow, congrats. That's great.
1431
01:51:06,834 --> 01:51:08,102
-Thanks.
-Vermont.
1432
01:51:08,335 --> 01:51:11,205
Yeah. I think
it'll be good for Sydney.
1433
01:51:11,338 --> 01:51:14,441
You know, everything
here still reminds her of...
1434
01:51:14,609 --> 01:51:15,976
Yeah.
1435
01:51:18,979 --> 01:51:21,048
We'll be closer to Josh's firm.
1436
01:51:21,916 --> 01:51:23,484
Uh, Josh, I...
1437
01:51:25,352 --> 01:51:27,121
oh, I, uh, I didn't know.
1438
01:51:28,422 --> 01:51:29,624
Congrats on that.
1439
01:51:29,790 --> 01:51:31,425
That's great.
Yeah, that's great.
1440
01:51:31,560 --> 01:51:32,627
Thank you.
1441
01:51:34,795 --> 01:51:36,430
We're just gonna do
something small in the backyard.
1442
01:51:36,598 --> 01:51:38,465
-You know?
-Yeah.
1443
01:51:38,633 --> 01:51:39,733
How about you?
1444
01:51:41,502 --> 01:51:42,637
Seeing anyone special?
1445
01:51:48,610 --> 01:51:51,546
-Oh.
-Hopeful romantic.
1446
01:51:52,746 --> 01:51:53,847
In time.
1447
01:51:57,117 --> 01:51:58,219
You know...
1448
01:51:59,853 --> 01:52:03,958
thank you for showing
my father kindness.
1449
01:52:06,561 --> 01:52:08,229
He saved my life.
1450
01:52:12,567 --> 01:52:15,135
Listen, I was gonna
swing by and just,
1451
01:52:15,302 --> 01:52:17,504
you know, pick up
some of Isabella's things.
1452
01:52:18,272 --> 01:52:19,340
Okay.
1453
01:52:20,975 --> 01:52:23,377
Yeah, um, any time. Yeah.
1454
01:52:23,545 --> 01:52:24,646
Okay.
1455
01:52:33,521 --> 01:52:35,222
Sydney wanted me
to give you this.
1456
01:52:36,691 --> 01:52:37,958
She's also been in therapy.
1457
01:52:48,269 --> 01:52:49,870
Can you tell her that
I love her?
1458
01:52:50,037 --> 01:52:51,939
She knows.
1459
01:52:53,807 --> 01:52:55,142
And I will.
1460
01:53:18,966 --> 01:53:22,136
Let's give it up one more time
for the amazing Melody.
1461
01:53:22,303 --> 01:53:23,504
Isn't she incredible?
1462
01:53:23,672 --> 01:53:25,039
Maybe she will
tell us her secrets.
1463
01:53:25,205 --> 01:53:26,273
What do you think?
1464
01:53:50,665 --> 01:53:52,333
-Hey.
-You're finally here.
1465
01:53:52,499 --> 01:53:55,637
We have to go put on
our costumes and do our makeup.
1466
01:53:55,770 --> 01:53:58,839
Costumes? Makeup?
1467
01:53:59,506 --> 01:54:02,009
Just remember what I taught you.
And try not to step on my feet.
1468
01:54:02,176 --> 01:54:03,812
You got this, Uncle Tiger.
1469
01:54:03,977 --> 01:54:05,680
We have a very
special guest for you next,
1470
01:54:05,846 --> 01:54:08,849
who is here in honor
of his best friend, Daryl.
1471
01:54:09,016 --> 01:54:13,287
So let's give a warm welcome
to Mr. Calvin Cole
1472
01:54:13,420 --> 01:54:15,590
and Miss Taylor Sparks.
1473
01:55:27,327 --> 01:55:29,496
I was thinking about
something Whitney said.
1474
01:55:32,734 --> 01:55:34,935
He said sometimes
we have to fall apart...
1475
01:55:36,704 --> 01:55:38,939
to find ourselves
all over again.
1476
01:55:40,875 --> 01:55:42,644
What does that mean to you?
1477
01:55:47,181 --> 01:55:50,752
Sometimes
the only way out is through.
1478
01:55:50,885 --> 01:55:51,952
Hmm.
1479
01:55:54,923 --> 01:55:56,023
And...
1480
01:55:58,392 --> 01:56:00,728
part of
the healing is letting go.
1481
01:56:03,263 --> 01:56:04,632
But I think mostly...
1482
01:56:06,166 --> 01:56:09,838
I just have to be okay
not being okay.
1483
01:56:12,339 --> 01:56:13,708
Good.
1484
01:56:18,011 --> 01:56:19,079
What about now?
1485
01:56:27,555 --> 01:56:28,890
I'm okay.
1486
01:56:34,228 --> 01:56:35,496
I guess I should, uh...
1487
01:56:37,397 --> 01:56:38,999
I guess I should give you this.
1488
01:56:45,272 --> 01:56:46,373
I'm a free man.
1489
01:56:48,141 --> 01:56:50,812
Well, I've been
talking to your doctors,
1490
01:56:50,979 --> 01:56:53,648
and they attribute
your improvement
1491
01:56:53,815 --> 01:56:56,551
to your willingness
to do the work.
1492
01:56:56,718 --> 01:57:00,655
But it's imperative
that we continue to study
1493
01:57:00,788 --> 01:57:03,558
your brain health
when you come back.
1494
01:57:06,995 --> 01:57:08,730
All right.
1495
01:57:10,598 --> 01:57:12,299
This is goodbye only for now.
1496
01:57:17,972 --> 01:57:19,439
For now.
1497
01:57:22,877 --> 01:57:23,978
Thanks.
1498
01:57:26,480 --> 01:57:29,517
Um, Cal, uh...
1499
01:57:30,752 --> 01:57:32,419
I made this for you.
1500
01:57:32,587 --> 01:57:36,189
It's your schedule
for when you return.
1501
01:57:36,891 --> 01:57:38,726
When the real work begins.
1502
01:57:41,061 --> 01:57:42,262
I don't know what to say.
1503
01:57:46,968 --> 01:57:48,335
Thank you.
1504
01:57:52,707 --> 01:57:54,308
I'm so proud of you, Calvin.
1505
01:58:00,414 --> 01:58:01,549
You matter.
1506
01:58:03,017 --> 01:58:05,218
- Dr. Knox?
- Oh, you must be Jordan.
1507
01:58:05,352 --> 01:58:07,120
Come on in. Have a seat.
1508
01:58:10,424 --> 01:58:12,760
Well, I guess
I didn't screw you up too bad.
1509
01:58:14,963 --> 01:58:16,463
You got this.
1510
01:58:23,136 --> 01:58:26,774
Okay, Jordan. You like Play-Doh?
1511
01:58:26,941 --> 01:58:31,512
I love this stuff.
It lets out all the tension.
1512
01:58:31,646 --> 01:58:33,213
I know this is going to
sound a little heavy...
1513
01:58:48,596 --> 01:58:51,099
Just remember,
I never drove you here.
1514
01:59:24,999 --> 01:59:26,233
Sorry. I knocked, I--
1515
01:59:26,400 --> 01:59:29,103
I just-- I was going to...
1516
01:59:30,772 --> 01:59:32,840
I was just going to
give you these.
1517
01:59:36,811 --> 01:59:38,513
I won that at a bake sale.
1518
01:59:39,914 --> 01:59:41,348
I guess
it's a family heirloom now?
1519
01:59:42,850 --> 01:59:45,019
It looks better on you.
1520
02:00:22,890 --> 02:00:24,391
Physical pain...
1521
02:00:25,593 --> 02:00:27,461
reminds us that we're alive.
1522
02:00:31,065 --> 02:00:32,600
But it's the mental pain...
1523
02:00:33,835 --> 02:00:36,604
that tests whether or not
we're going to stay that way.
1524
02:00:39,807 --> 02:00:44,377
Whether it's the warrior's
thousand-yard stare
on the battlefield
1525
02:00:44,545 --> 02:00:47,347
or the cosmonaut
who breaches the unknown.
1526
02:00:50,551 --> 02:00:51,919
Our pain is relative.
1527
02:00:53,788 --> 02:00:56,057
Sometimes we've got to
fall apart...
1528
02:00:57,592 --> 02:00:59,493
to find ourselves
all over again.
1529
02:03:33,581 --> 02:03:35,049
Nigel, you've gone to war.
1530
02:03:35,216 --> 02:03:36,751
Why did you get
involved in this?
1531
02:03:36,918 --> 02:03:40,521
My grandfather was
a POW of the Second World War.
1532
02:03:40,688 --> 02:03:43,658
He was a Polish farmer
that was captured
1533
02:03:43,791 --> 02:03:46,227
during the Nazi
takeover of Poland
1534
02:03:46,394 --> 02:03:48,963
and enslaved on his own land.
1535
02:03:49,130 --> 02:03:50,497
And Matt?
1536
02:03:50,665 --> 02:03:52,233
Originally,
when I came onto this project,
1537
02:03:52,400 --> 02:03:54,501
Stephen had kind of
pitched to me just to--
1538
02:03:54,669 --> 02:03:57,171
he wanted to make
a film about soldiers
1539
02:03:57,338 --> 02:03:59,206
transitioning
back into civilian life.
1540
02:03:59,373 --> 02:04:01,375
And at the beginning, I thought,
"Yeah, that sounds cool,"
1541
02:04:01,542 --> 02:04:04,211
but it just took me sitting down
in front of our first veteran
1542
02:04:04,378 --> 02:04:06,147
for it to become very personal.
1543
02:04:06,380 --> 02:04:08,516
No matter
your political background,
no matter your religion,
1544
02:04:08,649 --> 02:04:10,885
we would just sit there
and listen.
1545
02:04:11,052 --> 02:04:13,554
And I think that
that has got us as far
1546
02:04:13,721 --> 02:04:15,589
as why we're sitting
in front of you today.
1547
02:04:15,756 --> 02:04:17,391
According to a RAND study,
1548
02:04:17,558 --> 02:04:21,395
20% of Iraq and Afghanistan
veterans suffer from PTSD.
1549
02:04:21,562 --> 02:04:23,764
Half don't seek treatment. Why?
1550
02:04:23,931 --> 02:04:27,268
Essentially, the military
is able to strip you down
to build you back up.
1551
02:04:27,435 --> 02:04:30,438
And that's what keeps you alive,
but it also
is what allows you to kill.
1552
02:04:30,604 --> 02:04:33,374
You come back home,
and the biggest challenge
1553
02:04:33,541 --> 02:04:37,144
is trying to assimilate
back into a civilian populace
1554
02:04:37,311 --> 02:04:40,480
that doesn't have the same
thoughts and feelings as you do.
1555
02:04:40,648 --> 02:04:43,217
But what you went through
was abnormal.
1556
02:04:43,351 --> 02:04:44,552
But you are normal.